A pamphlet of feline opinion · est. mmxxv
Pete, the resident feline critic
The Pete Gazette
The Backpacks Desk Reviewed for kids & the grown-ups who shop for them Reviewed from the windowsill
Also Reviewed
Na! Na! Na! Surprise
Imposter Mouse Receives the Ultimate Snub
★☆☆☆☆
Handmade World
Leather Fortress Claimed as Mobile Headquarters
★★★★★
GOBUROS
Dream Chariot Hijacked by the Nemesis RC Car
★☆☆☆☆
From the wires — the critic descends upon the next desk shortly. The toys have been warned.
Lead Review · From: REAL LITTLES
Dangly Scented Puffball Yields Worthless Intel
Our critic's instincts overwhelm his dignity when the clipped Meow Meow Donut swings past ambush altitude, yet the captured backpack yields only glittery pens and cartoon-donut notebooks.
By Pete · Resident Feline Critic

My human has brought home a... "micro backpack." It appears to be a small, fluffy sac designed for Lilliputian scholars, as it's filled with minuscule, scented "stationery" that is entirely useless to anyone without opposable thumbs the size of a grain of rice. The concept is an insult to proper backpacks, which should be large enough to nap in. However, th…

Continued on the story page →
Image of REAL LITTLES - Scented Surprise Micro Backpacks, Soft, Fluffy, Cute Food Themed Micro Backpack With 5 Scented Real Working Micro Stationery Surprises Inside, 6 To Collect
Fig. 1 — the subject
Pete's Verdict
★★★☆☆
Hunt well-executed, loot disappointing.
From The Desk
Image of Funko Pop! Fashion Backpack: Dark Magician Girl Mini-Backpack
Funko
Pocket Dimension Sealed Beneath Superior Posterior

My human has presented me with this... thing. It is clearly not a toy. It's a small, rigid sack made of some unpleasantly smooth "vegan leather," which translates to "plastic that…

★★☆☆☆ — Worthy adversary. Already defeated.
More From The Desk
Image of Funko Nylon Backpack: Star Wars, Ahsoka All Over Print
Funko
Strap Serpent Defeated, Cave Interior Claimed

So, my Human has presented me with another one of their acquisitions. It appears to be a large, soft-shelled container for hauling their possessions,…

★★★☆☆
Image of VOLCOM Yard Canvas Backpack, DUST Gold, One Size
Volcom
Desert-Gold Canvas Napping Spot Passes All Trials

My human has acquired what appears to be a transport vessel from the brand "Volcom," a name that suggests rugged, outdoor activities I have no intere…

★★★★★
Image of EocuSun Large Mesh Beach Bag Tote Durable Drawstring Beach Backpack Swim and Pool Balls Storage Bags Packs, Stay Away From Sand and Water, Toy Not Included, Blue
EocuSun
Toy Not Included, Freedom Delivered by Midnight Heist

My human seems to believe my life's purpose is to vet their questionable purchases. This latest object, the "EocuSun Large Mesh Beach Bag," is a prim…

★★★☆☆
Image of Naturally KIDS Unicorn Toys for Age 3, Birthday Gifts for 2 Year Old Girls, 3 Year Old Girl Gifts, Toddler Unicorn Backpack
Naturally KIDS
Velcro Defeated, Captive Unicorn Liberated at Midnight

My human, in their infinite and often misguided wisdom, has acquired what appears to be a transportation device for a miniature version of themselves…

★★★☆☆
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