A pamphlet of feline opinion · est. mmxxv
Pete, the resident feline critic
The Pete Gazette
The Little People Desk Reviewed for kids & the grown-ups who shop for them Reviewed from the windowsill
Lead Review · From: Fisher-Price
Farm Cult Dismantled; Pig and Corn Under New Management
Our critic exposes the cheerful barn as a brainwashing compound and liberates one pig and one corn cob before declaring revolution.

My human has presented me with what appears to be a garish, primary-colored effigy of a rural prison. This "Caring for Animals Farm Playset" from Fisher-Price is, ostensibly, for the Small Human, who seems to delight in noise and chaos. It is a plastic barn that erupts in a cacophony of songs and phrases at the slightest touch, a feature designed to assault…

Continued on the story page →
Image of Fisher-Price Little People Toddler Learning Toy Caring for Animals Farm Playset with Smart Stages for Pretend Play Kids Ages 1+ Years​ (Amazon Exclusive)
Fig. 1 — the subject
Pete's Verdict
★★★☆☆
Components liberated; compound condemned.
More From The Desk
Image of Fisher-Price Little People Toddler Toys Classroom Figures 10-Piece Set for Preschool Pretend Play for Kids Ages 1+ Years
Fisher-Price
Ten Smiling Fools Offer No Resistance Whatsoever

My human, you've presented me with a new flock of miniature bipeds from the Fisher-Price institution, a purveyor of things for the loud, sticky, smal…

★★★☆☆
Image of Fisher-Price Little People Toddler Learning Toy Friends Together Play House Set with Smart Stages for Pretend Play Kids Ages 1+ Years​
Fisher-Price
Plastic Kingdom Has a New Landlord; Toilet Confirms It

Honestly, the human has finally lost its mind. This is a miniature plastic domicile, clearly intended for the unrefined palate of a small, sticky hum…

★★★★☆
Image of Fisher-Price Little People Toddler Toys Police Car Push-Along Vehicle & Figure for Pretend Play Preschool Kids Ages 1+ Years
Fisher-Price
Officer Ejected; Pete Jurisdiction Now Fully Established

My human, in their infinite and often misguided wisdom, has presented me with a "Police Car" from the Fisher-Price conglomerate. Ostensibly, this is …

★★★☆☆
Image of Fisher-Price Little People Toddler Toys Farm Animal Friends 8-Piece Figure Set for Pretend Play Ages 1+ Years
Fisher-Price
Llama Crew Outmaneuvered; Pete Holds the Stage

My human, in their infinite and often misguided wisdom, has presented a collection of plastic effigies from a brand called Fisher-Price. Apparently, …

★★★☆☆
Other Desks In This Section
⬆ Up a level
About Pete Printed daily, ignored nightly Privacy Policy