My human, in their infinite capacity for acquiring large, useless plastic objects, has procured a battle-scarred green shell for their own head. It is apparently inspired by some noisy "HALO" light-box game they stare at for hours, a blatant insult to my own far more captivating presence. This "helmet" comes with a stand, as if to declare its own importance…
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So, the human has acquired another box of colorful, flat rectangles from a company audaciously named "PlayMonster"—as if there were any other in this…
So, my human has acquired another one of those flat, colorful sleeping mats they call a "board game." This one, from a company named Hasbro, appears …
My human seems to believe this shiny metal rectangle holds some sort of entertainment. From my analysis, it's a collection of stiff, papery squares f…
My Human, in their infinite and often baffling wisdom, has acquired what appears to be a small, plastic gargoyle. This 'Funko Pop' of a creature they…
My human has presented me with a small, rectangular box containing what appears to be a collection of stiff, colorful paper squares. From their inces…
My human, in their infinite and often misguided wisdom, has presented me with what they seem to think is a "toy." From what I can gather, it is a rat…