Frankly, my human must assume my intellect is on par with the drooling, non-furry creature they push around in that wheeled cage. This "Itzy Ritzy" contraption is, by their own admission, for infants. It's a pastel, coiling appendage designed to be strapped to a conveyance I wouldn't be caught dead in. Purportedly, its purpose is to entertain the Small Huma…
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My human seems to have acquired this spiraling contraption for the new, smaller human that cries a lot. It’s a plush, black-and-white cow wrapped aro…
It seems my staff has procured a "GZYFUVALW" creation, a name that sounds like someone fell asleep on their keyboard. It is, ostensibly, a soft, spir…
My human, in their infinite and often misguided wisdom, has procured a dangling bauble for the small, loud human who now cohabitates my space. It app…
My human has presented me with what they seem to think is a "toy," though its official designation as an "Infantino Stretch & Spiral Activity Toy" su…