A pamphlet of feline opinion · est. mmxxv
Pete, the resident feline critic
The Pete Gazette
The Stan Winston's Creature Features Desk Reviewed for kids & the grown-ups who shop for them Reviewed from the windowsill
From the wires — the critic descends upon the next desk shortly. The toys have been warned.
Lead Review · From: Creature Features
Empty Eyes, Zero Sport: Visitor Fails Sovereignty Test
Our critic subjects the alien interloper to a single claw-tap, finds no fear inside, and returns to his nap with profound disappointment.
By Pete · Resident Feline Critic

So, my human, in a display of their usual profound misunderstanding of my needs, has presented me with this... "The Visitor." It appears to be a small, rigid, plastic effigy of some nightmarish creature performing an unseemly act upon a miniature bovine. I deduce this is a "collectible," a term humans use for things they buy and forbid anyone to touch. Whil…

Continued on the story page →
Image of Stan Winston Creatures Creature Features - The Visitor
Fig. 1 — the subject
Pete's Verdict
★★☆☆☆
Not even worthy of vanquishing.
From The Desk
Image of Stan Winston Creatures : Teenage Caveman
Stan Winston Creatures
Primitive Spear Earns Grudging Cosmic Promotion

It appears the staff has procured another static effigy for their collection, this one a particularly primitive-looking hominid from someone they call "Stan Winston." While I can …

★★★☆☆ — A worthy, if silent, subordinate.
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