A pamphlet of feline opinion · est. mmxxv
Pete, the resident feline critic
The Pete Gazette
The Power Ranger Desk Reviewed for kids & the grown-ups who shop for them Reviewed from the windowsill
Also Reviewed
Jada
Twenty Tiny Metal Rangers Become a Floor Orchestra
★★★☆☆
Playskool
Lumbering Robot Yields One Priceless Silver Accessory
★★☆☆☆
Power Rangers
Ranger Key Meets Its Destiny Inside a Heating Vent
★★☆☆☆
From the wires — the critic descends upon the next desk shortly. The toys have been warned.
Lead Review · From: Power Rangers
Six Plastic Suspects Guilty of Absolute Nothing
Pete investigates six twelve-inch Power Rangers and closes the case immediately, finding them guilty of terminal dullness and confiscating zero tuna in the process.
By Pete · Resident Feline Critic

My human, in their infinite and often baffling wisdom, has procured a large cardboard sarcophagus containing what appear to be six brightly colored, plastic effigies. They call them "Power Rangers." I call them an unnecessary crowd. These are twelve-inch statues of humans in garish, monochromatic suits, each armed with a tiny, chokable-looking weapon. They …

Continued on the story page →
Image of Power Rangers Mighty Morphin Multipack 12-inch Action Figure 6-Pack, Toys with Accessories for Kids 4 and Up (Amazon Exclusive)
Fig. 1 — the subject
Pete's Verdict
★☆☆☆☆
Guilty of being profoundly uninteresting.
From The Desk
Image of Power Rangers Cosmic Fury Cosmic Morpher Electronic Sound Scanning Color Change Lights and Sounds Kids Role Play Toys for Girls and Boys Ages 5 and Up
Power Rangers
Spy Gadget Unwittingly Recruits a Feline Operative

My human, in their infinite and questionable wisdom, has acquired a plastic gauntlet. Apparently, it is a "Cosmic Morpher," which allows the wearer to pretend they are one of the …

★★★☆☆ — A useful tool, once properly commandeered.
More From The Desk
Image of Power Rangers Ninja Steel DX Ninja Battle Morpher
Power Rangers
Pop-Up Blade Redeems an Otherwise Deafening Gauntlet

My human has presented me with what appears to be a gauntlet for a small, clumsy giant. They call it a "Ninja Battle Morpher," which is a needlessly …

★★★☆☆
Image of Power Rangers Masks Set - Bundle 2 Pack with Red and Blue Power Ranger Masks for Dress Up Pretend Play, Stickers, More | Costume Accessories for Kids
Power Rangers
Hollow Plastic Faces Fail; Cardboard Dangler Delivers

My human, in their infinite and often misguided wisdom, has procured a set of plastic face shields intended for their smaller, noisier counterparts. …

★★☆☆☆
Image of Power Rangers Lightning Collection Mighty Morphin MMPR Morpher
Power Rangers
Heavy Golden Coins Outclass Their Flashy Host Device

My Human has presented me with a heavy, metallic rectangle that apparently has some deep, spiritual significance to his species. It is called a "Powe…

★★☆☆☆
Image of Power Rangers Dino Super Charge Morper and T-Rex Morpher Blaster Set
Power Rangers
Accidental Light Show Transforms Noisy Blaster Into Prey

Honestly, my human must think I've suffered some sort of head injury. They've presented me with a garish hunk of plastic clearly intended for a small…

★★★★☆
Image of Power Rangers Dino Knight Morpher Toy with Lights, Sounds and Red Ranger Key - 5+ Years
Detachable Key Vanishes; Giant Gauntlet Gets the Chair

Hmph. My human has presented me with this... *thing*. Based on their primitive pictograms and the cacophony of words associated with it, this appears…

★★☆☆☆
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