A pamphlet of feline opinion · est. mmxxv
Pete, the resident feline critic
The Pete Gazette
The Helicopter Desk Reviewed for kids & the grown-ups who shop for them Reviewed from the windowsill
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★★★☆☆
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★☆☆☆☆
Dolanus
Blue Drone Repelled by Psychological Warfare This Time
★★★☆☆
From the wires — the critic descends upon the next desk shortly. The toys have been warned.
Lead Review · From: BUSSGO
Luminous Sky-Scout Granted Residency After Inspection
Our critic dismisses the BUSSGO as a mechanical sky-bug until its colour-shifting lights and stable hover reveal a worthy aerial rival deserving of ongoing engagement.
By Pete · Resident Feline Critic

My human has procured a mechanical sky-bug from a brand called BUSSGO, which sounds about as inspiring as dry kibble. Ostensibly, it's a 'helicopter' for their small, loud offspring, but I see it for what it truly is: a potential challenger for aerial dominance in my living room. Its primary assets are the garish, multi-colored lights—a feature guaranteed t…

Continued on the story page →
Image of BUSSGO RC Helicopter, Remote Control Helicopter for Kids with 30Mins Flight(2 Batteries), 7+1 LED Light Modes, Altitude Hold, RC Toys for Boys Girls
Fig. 1 — the subject
Pete's Verdict
★★★★☆
Our games have only just begun.
From The Desk
Image of Helicopter
HSKLOCK
Ancient Bamboo Stick Briefly Outwits a Modern Cat

My human has presented me with something called a "Helicopter" by a company named HSKLOCK, a name that sounds less like a toymaker and more like a vendor of low-grade security dev…

★★★☆☆ — An offering accepted, for now.
More From The Desk
Image of SYMA Remote Control Helicopter, S52H Military Transport RC Helicopters with Altitude Hold, One Key take Off/Landing, LED Light, Low Battery Reminder, Army Toys for Kids and Military Fans
SYMA
Twin-Rotor Scout Cleared to Run Training Drills

My human has acquired what appears to be a miniature, noisy beast of war from a brand called SYMA. It's a "military transport helicopter," which is a…

★★★☆☆
Image of Driven by Battat – Micro 1:24 Scale – Helicopter Toy with Lights and Sound – Open-able Doors – Rescue Helicopter for Kids Age 3+
Driven by Battat
Spinning Rotor Drafted as Private Flight Simulator

My human, in another baffling attempt to understand my sophisticated needs, has presented me with this... *thing*. It is, apparently, a miniature aer…

★★★★☆
Image of ArtCreativity Diecast Helicopters - Pack of 4 - Police, Fire Engine, EMS, and Military Diecast Toy Choppers with Spinning Propellers, Birthday Party Favors for Boys and Girls
ArtCreativity
Green Survivor Earns Respect; Three Others Are Scattered

My Human, in a fit of what I can only assume was profound boredom, has presented a quartet of miniature, non-functional flying machines. They are app…

★★★☆☆
Image of Green Toys Helicopter, Blue/Green
Green Toys
Recycled Milk Jug Survives a Ten-Minute Theater of War

My human, in a fit of what they likely consider generosity, has presented me with this bulky, blue and green contraption they call a "helicopter." It…

★★★☆☆
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