Pete's Expert Summary
It appears the human has procured a six-pack of what the 'DINOBROS' brand, with a stunning lack of subtlety, calls 'Dinosaur Cars.' These are, essentially, small, garishly-colored plastic beasts—a T-Rex, a Triceratops, and other such historical Ruffians—crudely fused to wheeled contraptions. The entire affair is allegedly for 'toddlers,' which is an immediate mark against it. However, the 'pull back and go' feature presents a flicker of potential. An object that moves quickly and erratically across the floor *could* be a worthy adversary for a brief, exhilarating chase. More likely, it will be a loud, cheap prelude to a nap.
Key Features
- [6-PACK DINOSAUR CARS] A collection of 6 artfully-crafted roadster dinosaur pull back toy cars make perfect dino toys for 3 year old boys. Our dinosaur toys include T-Rex, Triceratops, Stegosaurus, Ankylosaur, Pterosaur, and Velociraptor.
- [PERFECT MINI SIZE] Small Size Dinosaur Pull Back Toy Cars are approximately 5" in length. This size makes the dinos toys for toddlers and boys easy to hold and play with the dinosaur cars. Recommended toys for boys ages 3, 4, and 5.
- [PULL BACK TOY CARS] The simple pull back and go dinosaur cars are easy to play, go fast and sturdy. These dino toys for 3-year-olds and up, teach children about different dinosaurs. Just pull it back and watch the dino cars race in the room.
- [GREAT TOYS FOR BOYS & TODDLERS] Dinosaur cars make a great party favor or a winning prize at a dinosaur themed birthday party. The dino pull back toy cars make for fun dino games. Our dino cars can help a child learn about dinosaurs.
- [DINOSAUR TOYS] The 6 distinct dinosaur cars designed as a roadster pull back car toy make great toys for boys or girls. The dino toys make a great birthday gift or a special toy to give to any child who loves dinosaurs.
A Tale from Pete the Cat
The ceremony began, as it often does, with the human kneeling on the floor, an act of supplication I generally appreciate. But this time, they were not presenting a tribute of treats or stroking my magnificent tuxedo-patterned fur. Instead, they held a grotesque green creature, a so-called "T-Rex," with oversized wheels where its dignity should have been. The human dragged it backward along the polished hardwood, producing a grating, high-pitched *zzzzzzip* that set my teeth on edge. Then, they released it. The plastic fiend shot forward, a blur of cheap paint and frantic momentum, before crashing unceremoniously into the leg of the sofa. The human giggled. I, observing from the regal perch of the armchair, was not amused. It was an oracle, I decided. A crude, noisy oracle delivering a message I could not yet decipher. I descended from my throne, my paws silent on the rug. The green oracle lay still, its painted-on, idiotic grin facing the ceiling. I gave it a cursory sniff. It smelled of a factory and the human's hand. Utterly unimpressive. I was about to dismiss the whole charade and demand my mid-afternoon snack when the human performed the ritual again, this time with a blue one—the "Triceratops." *Zzzzzzip... WHOOSH!* This one veered left, coming to a stop directly in front of my empty water bowl. The message was becoming clearer. These plastic soothsayers were not speaking of grand destinies, but of my immediate and pressing needs. They were clumsy, loud heralds of my staff's negligence. This changed everything. This was no longer a toy; it was a tool for communication. When the human reached for the pterosaur, I intervened. I placed a soft but firm paw on their hand, my gaze intense. I looked from the human to the blue oracle by my water bowl, then back to the human. I let out a soft, melodic "Mrrrow?" that clearly communicated, "The prophecy has been delivered. Act upon it." The human, slow as they are, seemed to understand. They abandoned the ritual and filled my bowl with fresh, cool water. The DINOBROS themselves are common, undignified things. I would never deign to truly *play* with them as they are intended. But as conduits for my will? As gaudy little messengers that can be strategically deployed to highlight the deficiencies in household services? In that, they have found a purpose. They are not toys for me, but rather, tools for training my human. For that, they are marginally acceptable.
