Pete's Expert Summary
So, the Human has acquired a bulk container of what appear to be fifty brightly colored, rubbery effigies of their own species, designed to be flung at vertical surfaces. The concept, I admit, has a flicker of potential. An object that clings to the wall and tumbles downward could, in theory, mimic the desperate, flailing escape of cornered prey. However, the sheer quantity and the "party favor" designation suggest a profound lack of quality. The manufacturer, "Shindel," sounds less like a purveyor of fine feline amusements and more like a company that also sells plastic cutlery. I foresee these sticky acrobats becoming instantly coated in my own superior fur, losing their one redeeming quality, and ending their short, tragic lives as forgotten dust-magnets under the credenza. A fleeting distraction at best.
Key Features
- Super Value Pack - Keep your kids entertained for hours with our super value pack of 50 sticky wall climbers (multiple colors, each is 2 x 4 inches)! Each one is individually wrapped and won't stick together, making it easy to share with friends, on-the-go design.
- Fun to Play With - Our novelty sticky man toys are sure to be a hit with kids! Featuring colorful designs and sticky hands and feet, these toys will stick to walls, windows, and other smooth surfaces with various postures, providing endless entertainment. These sticky men are so stretchy that they can be pull quite long.
- Premium Quality - Made from high-quality rubber and plastic, our sticky window crawler men are durable, stretchy, and won't break easily. Plus, they're non-toxic and odorless, so parents can feel good about letting their kids play with them. Even if these novelty toys are dirty, you just need to wash with water and then they can be reused.
- Wide Applications - our sticky ninja wall tumblers are perfect for party favors, classroom prizes, goodie bag fillers, and more. They also make great gifts for birthdays, holidays, and other special occasions.
- CAUTION - Part of the product's plastic shell may take off due to transportation problems, if you encounter this situation you can refer to picture 4 to install the plastic shell. In addition, it may become a one-time toy if you play on a rough surface with lime, dust, etc.
A Tale from Pete the Cat
The first assault came without warning. I was performing a routine patrol of the upstairs hallway, my paws silent on the hardwood, when a flash of neon green flickered in my periphery. *Thwack.* A grotesque, humanoid shape was suddenly plastered against the pristine white paint of the wall. It clung there for a moment, a lurid stain on my otherwise perfect territory, before peeling itself off with a sickeningly slow *schluuurp*, tumbling end over end once, and then slapping back onto the surface. It was an invader. A clumsy, undignified one, but an invader nonetheless. My Human, the clear collaborator in this home invasion, chortled and released another: a garish blue one. It followed its green compatriot in a similarly pathetic descent. I did not dignify them with a pounce. That would be a waste of energy. Instead, I retreated to the shadows of the linen closet, my eyes narrowed to slits, observing the enemy's tactics. They were predictable. They were weak. Their adhesive limbs, their only weapon, were also their greatest vulnerability. I watched as the green one, upon its third tumble, collected a stray tuft of my own magnificent gray fur from the baseboard. Its stickiness was instantly compromised. It slipped, failed to re-adhere, and fell to the floor with a pathetic *flop*. The campaign was short-lived. A dozen of these "climbers" were deployed, littering the hallway with their brightly colored corpses. My counter-attack was subtle, a masterclass in psychological warfare. I didn't need to lay a single paw on them. I simply walked through the battlefield, my luxurious tail brushing against the fallen, generously coating them in a fine patina of dust and dander. I watched the Human's amusement fade as their wall-crawling army was neutralized by the ambient conditions of my domain. Ultimately, these were not worthy adversaries. They were flimsy, disposable infantry, sent on a fool's errand. They lacked the erratic flight of a moth, the tantalizing rustle of a paper bag, the dignified resistance of a quality feather wand. They were a cheap thrill for a simple mind. I gave a dismissive flick of my ear, turned my back on the fallen soldiers, and leaped onto the bed for a well-deserved nap. The war was over before it had truly begun.
