Pete's Expert Summary
So, the Human has presented me with this... simulacrum. A miniature, plastic version of their own kind, intended to teach their smaller, louder offspring the basics of servitude—I mean, 'caring.' An admirable goal, I suppose, though one they could learn more effectively by simply observing my needs. The doll itself is a static, unblinking affront to good taste and a waste of perfectly good plastic that could have been a jingle ball. However, I will concede two points of interest: the box it arrived in, which promises at least an afternoon of strategic territorial occupation, and the so-called 'microfabric blanket.' At 13 by 13 inches, it's a pathetically small offering for a human, but it just might be the perfect size for a cat of my distinguished stature to claim as a personal napping mat. The other trivialities are destined for a life under the sofa.
Key Features
- My First Doll Set, ideal for little kids to introduce them to the world of caring and loving. Small in size, making it easy for children to hold, cuddle and carry.
- Includes: 12'' baby doll, pacifier, blanket, and feeding bottle.
- Pretend Play, Encourages holding, nurturing and special care to improve child development and social skills while engaging in pretend playtime.
- The Perfect Gift, Comes packaged ready for use or to hand over as the perfect gift for Christmas, Holidays, Birthdays, or any other time.
- The Enjoyin Promise: We know that early childhood development and enjoyment go hand-in-hand. That's why we strive to make products that will stimulate the imagination, develop early childhood tools, and educate young minds, all while still being tons of fun! We promise to do everything we can to make sure that you or your loved ones are 100% satisfied with your purchase!
A Tale from Pete the Cat
Its arrival was announced by the squeals of the little human, the one who has yet to master the art of the gentle, respectful pet. She called it "Baby." I, from my vantage point on the cool leather of the ottoman, judged it to be a pale, soulless golem. It had a blank stare that I found deeply unsettling, as if it knew my deepest desire was to nap for twenty-three hours a day. It was placed on the rug, propped up against a cushion, holding court over my domain. I had half a mind to file a formal complaint with a well-placed hairball, but decided on a period of detached observation instead. The little human spent an hour attempting to force a tiny plastic bottle into the doll’s sealed mouth, a futile exercise I could appreciate from a philosophical standpoint. My interest was piqued only when she draped a small, offensively pink blanket over the creature's legs. The fabric caught the light in a way that spoke of softness, of a quality nap, of a texture that would be divine against my magnificent gray fur. The doll did not deserve such finery. It was an imposter, a pretender to the throne of comfort that was rightfully mine. My approach was a study in stealth. I flowed from the ottoman like a silent, smoky shadow, my paws making no sound on the hardwood. I circled the scene, my tail a low, questioning banner. The little human was now trying to insert the pacifier, another piece of useless plastic. This was my moment. With a casual flick of my tail, I "accidentally" brushed the pacifier from her hand. It skittered under the sofa. As she scrambled after it, chattering nonsense, I made my move. One swift, elegant motion and the blanket was mine, dragged several feet away into a patch of afternoon sun. I settled onto my prize. The microfabric was, as I suspected, exquisite. It was the perfect size for a single, discerning cat. When the little human returned, pacifier in hand, she found her "Baby" bare-legged and me in a state of blissful repose. She looked from the doll to me, a flicker of understanding in her eyes. She shrugged, placed the pacifier on the doll's chest, and left us. The golem stared on, unchanging. My verdict is this: The doll is a Trojan Horse. On its own, it is an insult to the very concept of "play." But it is a vessel, a delivery system for a truly superior napping accessory. For its service in bringing this blanket into my life, the plastic husk has earned the right to exist. For now.
