A photo of Pete the cat

Pete's Toy Box: MEGA BLOKS

MEGA BLOKS First Builders Toddler Blocks Toys Set, Big Building Bag with 80 Pieces and Storage, Pink, Ages 1+ Years

By: Mega Brands

Pete's Expert Summary

My human, in a fit of what I can only describe as profound confusion, has presented me with a large, crinkly bag of colorful plastic chunks. The packaging suggests these "Mega Bloks" are for small, clumsy humans called "toddlers" to practice their primitive construction skills. While the notion of "creative learning" is frankly beneath me, I will concede a few points of interest. The blocks are large enough to be batted satisfyingly across the hardwood floors without posing a choking hazard that would alarm my staff into a vet visit. The true prize, however, may be the storage bag itself, which looks to be a promising napping receptacle once emptied of its loud, useless contents. The primary appeal here is not the toy itself, but its potential for creating loud, glorious chaos.

Key Features

  • The #1 Junior Construction Toy in the U.S.A. Features 80 blocks in 10 shapes and 9 vibrant colors
  • Build Them Up Big Building Bag is designed for little hands and growing minds
  • Creative Learning Play Toddlers can build anything they imagine and learn colors
  • Compatible with Other Name Brands Combine stacking toys for endless big building fun
  • For Preschoolers Ages 1+ - Big blocks help to develop creativity, imagination, and fine motor skills

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The offering was presented on the living room rug, a zippered sack of crinkling plastic that hummed with potential. My human unzipped it, and the scent of new, sterile plastic—a scent I find deeply uninteresting—wafted out. They then committed the true sin: they tipped it over. A cascade of offensively bright pink, purple, and lime green blocks clattered onto the floor. I flattened my ears in distaste. This wasn't a toy; it was a mess. A task. My human, my chief of staff, had failed to curate my environment and instead introduced garish rubble. They began to stack them, one upon the other, creating a wobbly, multi-colored tower that defied all principles of elegant architecture. I watched from the arm of the sofa, my tail a metronome of rising indignation. They called this "building"? This flimsy, unstable pillar? It was an insult to the very concept of structure. I have seen birds' nests with more integrity. When they finished, they looked at me with that hopeful, simple expression, as if expecting my approval. I descended from my perch with the gravitas the moment required. This was not play; this was a structural integrity audit. I circled the tower once, my white tuxedo pristine against the chaos of color. I sniffed a lurid purple block at the base. It smelled of nothing. I extended a single, perfect paw, claws sheathed, and gave the tower a gentle, testing tap. It wobbled precariously. The human made a small, encouraging sound. Encouraging this shoddy craftsmanship? Unacceptable. That settled it. With a swift, powerful swipe of my paw—a blur of gray and white fur—I struck the tower at its weakest point. The resulting crash was magnificent. A cacophony of hollow plastic clattering against the wood floor, the blocks scattering like startled prey. One of them, a vibrant pink one, slid perfectly under the sofa. Excellent. I looked up at my human, who sighed. I gave a slow, deliberate blink. The blocks were individually useless, but as a system for creating a loud, dramatic mess for my staff to clean up? A resounding success. The game was not building the tower, but in the glorious, final act of un-building it. This would do. For now.
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MEGA BLOKS First Builders Toddler Blocks Toys Set, Deluxe Building Bag with 150 Pieces and Storage, Blue, Ages 1+ Years

By: Mega Brands

Pete's Expert Summary

My human has presented me with a gargantuan, crinkly sack filled with what appear to be oversized, brightly colored plastic tumors. I am told these 150 "Mega Bloks" are for the small, loud human, ostensibly to help its "growing mind." From my perspective, their primary function seems to be creating a treacherous, multi-colored obstacle course across my preferred sunning spots. While the blocks themselves are too large and unwieldy for a sophisticated game of bat-the-prey, the sheer architectural potential is intriguing. A tower, built by clumsy, tiny hands, is a tower begging to be toppled by a swift and elegant tail. The bag itself, a vast cavern of crinkling plastic, might also hold some promise for a secluded nap, once the noisy contents have been fully deployed for maximum chaos.

Key Features

  • First Blocks in Home Features 150 big building blocks including special shapes
  • Build Them Up Deluxe Building Bag is designed for little hands and growing minds
  • Creative Learning Play Toddlers can build anything they imagine and learn colors
  • Compatible with other MEGA BLOKS sets Combine stacking toys for endless big building fun
  • For Preschoolers Ages 1+ - Big blocks help to develop creativity, imagination, and fine motor skills

A Tale from Pete the Cat

It began with an auditory assault. A great, crinkling beast was dragged into the living room, and with a roar of tearing plastic, it disgorged its vibrant entrails all over the Persian rug. An avalanche of red, blue, yellow, and green. An aesthetic crime scene. The small human shrieked with a glee I reserve only for the sound of a can opener. I, naturally, retreated to the top of the bookshelf to pass judgment from a safe distance, my tail twitching in profound disapproval. This was not a toy. This was an invasion. Hours passed. The small human, having erected a series of structures that defied both gravity and good taste, was whisked away for its mandated hibernation period. Silence fell, and I descended to survey the damage. The rug was no longer a flat plane but a bizarre, alien landscape. It was a plastic mountain range, a field of geometric mesas and canyons. My initial disgust gave way to a grudging curiosity. I saw a path, a winding trail of single blocks leading through a valley of taller, stacked pieces. A challenge. My journey began at the "Yellow Foothills." I placed each paw with deliberate care, testing the slick surfaces. The blocks were large, stable enough to hold my weight, a quality I noted with a flicker of appreciation. I navigated the "Crimson Chasm," a gap between two poorly constructed walls, requiring a leap of faith I hadn't practiced since my kittenhood. The world smelled of clean plastic and the faint, sweet scent of the small human's snack. I was an explorer, an adventurer charting a new and temporary continent. My expedition culminated at the base of the tallest structure: a wobbly, nine-block tower of alternating blue and green. It was an insult to engineering, an affront to the very concept of a stable foundation. I reached the summit—a lone, flat yellow piece. From this meager height, I surveyed my kingdom. The conquest was complete. The blocks were not, as I had first assumed, a mindless nuisance. They were a dynamic environment, a test of skill, a landscape to be conquered and, ultimately, to be sent crashing to the floor with a single, perfectly executed shove. They had earned my respect, not as toys, but as worthy adversaries.
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MEGA BLOKS First Builders Toddler Building Blocks Toy Set, ABC Musical Train with 50 Pieces, Music and Sounds, Ages 1+ Years

By: Mega Brands

Pete's Expert Summary

My human, in a fit of what can only be described as profound species confusion, has presented me with this so-called "ABC Musical Train." It appears to be a garish, plastic conveyance designed for clumsy, miniature humans, known as "toddlers." It purports to teach the alphabet via chunky blocks—a remedial exercise I have no need for—and emits a variety of electronic squawks and chugging noises at the press of a smokestack. I will concede that the individual blocks, being lightweight and numerous, possess a certain potential for being batted under heavy furniture, a classic pastime. However, the cacophonous, pre-programmed music is a direct assault on the serene atmosphere required for my seventeen hours of daily sleep. A potential distraction, but likely a waste of a perfectly good sunbeam.

Key Features

  • Introduce Toddlers to ABCs – Blocks feature all the letters A through Z to learn the alphabet
  • Includes Music & Sounds – Musical train that plays real train sounds and music
  • Easy-to-Build Train – 50 pieces include big building blocks, rolling wheelbases, and smokestack piece
  • Compatible with Other Name Brands – Combine stacking toys and Build Them Up
  • For Preschoolers Ages 1+ Big blocks help to develop creativity, imagination, and fine motor skills

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The first sign of the invasion was auditory. A shrill, electronic jingle, followed by a chugging sound of immense stupidity, shattered the afternoon quiet. I lifted my head from the heated floor vent, one gray ear swiveling to pinpoint the source of this sacrilege. The Provider was on the floor, crouched over a pile of offensively bright plastic. He was assembling the thing, this… train. He clicked a green block onto a red one, then placed a yellow wheeled base beneath it. He seemed immensely proud of this rudimentary feat of engineering. I watched from a distance, my white-bibbed chest puffed out in silent judgment, my tail giving a slow, irritated thump against the rug. He completed his masterpiece and stood back to admire it: a long, wobbly train of primary colors, each car bearing a block with a crude letter stamped on it. He then committed the ultimate indignity. He pressed the smokestack. The terrible jingle blared again, and he gleefully chirped, "Look, Pete! It's the 'A' train!" I narrowed my eyes. He was mocking me. The entire alphabet, laid out like a buffet for the feeble-minded. I refused to grant him the satisfaction of a reaction and began meticulously grooming a single, perfect whisker. Hours later, long after the human had abandoned his colorful mess and retired for the night, I descended from my post atop the bookshelf. The moonlight cast long shadows from the plastic train, making it look like the skeletal remains of some foolish, candy-colored beast. My initial disgust had mellowed into a tactical curiosity. I padded silently towards the engine. The block on top was a "C." For Cat, I presumed. Obvious. I ignored it. I walked the length of the train, my soft paws making no sound. My gaze fell upon a blue block in the last car. It bore a "P." For Pete. This was personal. With the practiced grace of a seasoned hunter, I hooked a single, needle-sharp claw into the edge of the block. I didn't swat it. I didn't knock over the car. I simply… lifted. It came free with a soft click. I carried my prize into the darkened living room, hopped onto the velvet sofa, and deposited the "P" block squarely in the center of the human’s favorite cushion. Let him find it in the morning. The train was a foolish toy, but its components could serve as tools for sophisticated psychological warfare. It was, I decided with a slow blink, worthy. Not for play, but for purpose.
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MEGA BLOKS First Builders Toddler Building Blocks Toy Set, Build & Race Rig with 19 Pieces, 2 Race Cars and Storage, Red, Ages 1+ Years

By: Mega Bloks

Pete's Expert Summary

My human has presented me with a garishly red plastic transport vehicle, which I understand is called a "Build & Race Rig." Apparently, it is intended for a creature known as a "toddler," which I can only assume is a clumsy, less-evolved form of human. Inside this rig are nineteen large, brightly colored blocks and two small "race cars." While the blocks themselves are offensively simplistic and far too large for a satisfying game of bat-the-thing-off-the-counter, the concept is not entirely without merit. The two small cars have potential for being strategically lost under the heaviest furniture, and the fact that the entire contraption can be reconfigured into a ramp offers intriguing possibilities for launching projectiles—or myself—across short distances. It is an insult to my intelligence, but some components may yet prove useful.

Key Features

  • First Blocks in Home Features 19 pieces including 2 easy-to-build race cars
  • Creative Learning Play Reconfigure the rig with 3 track pieces and build big races
  • Easy Cleanup Blocks can be packed inside the rig for easy storage
  • Compatible with Other Name Brands Combine building toys for endless big building fun
  • For Preschoolers Ages 1+ - Big blocks help to develop creativity, imagination, and fine motor skills

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The Great Red Beast arrived on a Tuesday, a day typically reserved for extended sunbeam naps and contemplating the existential void within the food bowl. My human, with the clumsy enthusiasm of her species, unboxed it on the living room rug, my rug, and assembled a rudimentary ramp. She rolled a little blue car down it. “See, Pete? Vroom vroom!” I responded with a slow blink of utter disdain. Did she take me for a common alley cat, amused by such primitive physics? I turned my back, presenting her with the elegant gray and white fluff of my hindquarters, and waited for her to abandon the folly. Once the room was quiet, save for the hum of the refrigerator, I began my investigation. This was no mere toy; it was a proving ground. The rig itself was the hauler, the team transporter. The track pieces, flimsy as they were, formed the circuit. And the two cars, one red, one blue, were the challengers. I circled the setup, my tail twitching like a metronome of judgment. The blue car, the one my human had sullied with her "vroom vroom" nonsense, was the first to be tested. A single, precise tap from my paw sent it skittering off the track and into the dark abyss beneath the television stand. A spectacular failure of aerodynamics and handling. Pathetic. Next came the red car. I approached it with the gravity of a seasoned engineer. I nudged it with my nose, testing its balance. I ran a single, sheathed claw along its smooth plastic shell, checking for imperfections. It was… adequate. I positioned it at the apex of the ramp. This was not a game. This was a time trial for the Grand Prix of the Living Room. My opponent? The ghost of every fly that had ever presumed to buzz in my airspace. I released it. The red car rolled, true and straight, coming to a gentle stop near the leg of the coffee table. It held the line. It had potential. Over the next hour, I became the architect of a far more demanding course. Using the spare blocks as chicanes and barriers, I redesigned the circuit. The ramp was no longer a simple slope but the entry to a treacherous slalom. The red car was sent down again and again, each run a fraction faster, each turn a masterpiece of feline-guided momentum. I had no need for the blue car, which could languish in its dusty tomb. The red car was my champion. This plastic monstrosity, this "toddler toy," had been elevated. It was no longer a plaything; it was my personal motorsport training facility. It would do.
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MEGA BLOKS First Builders Toddler Building Blocks Toy Set, ABC Learning Train with 60 Pieces, Ages 1+ Years (Amazon Exclusive)

By: Mega Brands

Pete's Expert Summary

My human seems to believe that these gargantuan, aggressively colorful plastic bricks are a "toy." From my vantage point, it appears to be a rudimentary construction kit designed for a creature with far less dexterity and intellect than myself. The primary components are large blocks, presumably so they cannot be accidentally ingested by the target demographic, and emblazoned with letters of the alphabet—a charming attempt at pedagogy, I suppose. The only feature that piques my interest is the mention of "rolling wheelbases." A structure that moves, however slowly, has the potential to be prey. Otherwise, it is merely a pile of stationary clutter waiting to occupy a perfectly good sunbeam.

Key Features

  • Introduce Toddlers to ABCs Blocks feature all the letters A through Z to learn the alphabet
  • Easy-to-Build Train 60 pieces include big building blocks and rolling wheelbases
  • Easy to Grip, Stack, & Pull Apart Our blocks are designed specifically for toddlers' little hands
  • Compatible with Other Name Brands Combine stacking toys for endless big building fun
  • For Preschoolers Ages 1+ - Big blocks help to develop creativity, imagination, and fine motor skills

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The thing arrived in a cacophony of rustling cardboard and triumphant human babble. It was called the "ABC Learning Train," a name so profoundly unimaginative it could only have been conceived by a committee. From my observation post atop the bookcase, I watched my human assemble the garish beast. Red, yellow, and blue plastic clicked together, forming a long, segmented creature with black, circular feet. It sat there on the rug, a lurid insult to the tasteful gray-and-white decor of my home (and myself). This, I determined, was not a toy. It was an incursion. That evening, under the cloak of a moonbeam filtering through the blinds, I began my investigation. Operation: Dismantle the Intruder was a go. I approached with silent paws, my tuxedo-furred chest low to the ground. The target was silent, immobile. I nudged the front car with my nose. It smelled of bland, sterile plastic. Pathetic. The human had lauded its "Easy to Grip" design; I found a single claw was sufficient to hook under the edge of a block marked "G." With a practiced flick, I sent it skittering into the darkness under the sofa. The clatter was immensely satisfying. A successful first strike. Emboldened, I escalated my campaign. The train was a surprisingly fragile construct. A well-aimed swat to the coupling between the "M" and "N" cars caused a catastrophic structural failure, decoupling the entire rear half of the train. The blocks tumbled with a series of dull thuds. I was not merely a cat; I was a force of nature, a furry earthquake undoing this shoddy workmanship. I focused on the most valuable components: the rolling wheelbases. One by one, I batted them away from the wreckage, sending them careening into strategic hiding places—behind the curtains, under the radiator, into the shoe basket. Let the human search for their precious "learning." By dawn, the great ABC Train was no more. It lay in a scattered ruin, its alphabet blocks a meaningless jumble across the rug. I groomed a stray piece of fur from my shoulder, surveying my work with grim satisfaction. The mission was complete. The territory was secure once more. As an object of play, its true value lies not in its assembly, but in the profound, tactical joy of its complete and utter annihilation. A worthy opponent for a single night's work. I might even permit the human to reassemble it, just for the pleasure of taking it apart all over again.
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MEGA Bloks Fisher-Price Toddler Blocks Toys Set, Build ‘n Play Bag with 60 Plant-Based Pieces and Storage, Blue, Ages 1+ Years

By: Mattel

Pete's Expert Summary

My human, in a fit of what I can only describe as developmental confusion, has presented me with a sack of oversized, garishly colored plastic chunks. The label suggests they are "Building Blocks" for a creature known as a "toddler," and that they are derived from sugarcane, a fact I find both bizarre and unappetizing. The intended purpose seems to be stacking them into primitive, unstable towers, an activity with insultingly low intellectual demand. However, I must concede two points of interest. First, the sheer quantity—sixty of them—offers significant potential for widespread, chaotic distribution across the hardwood floors. Second, the crinkly, reusable bag they arrived in is, by itself, a far more promising object for investigation and future naps. The blocks are likely a waste of time, but the collateral play opportunities might just be worth a flick of my tail.

Key Features

  • Building set comes with 60 big building blocks, made from a minimum of 90% plant-based plastic composed of materials extracted from sugarcane
  • Building set arrives with the blocks loosely packed in the packaging
  • Includes 1 reusable bag for easy cleanup and storage
  • Blocks are compatible with all MEGA BLOKS building toys for endless learning fun
  • Ideal for ages 1+ and endorsed by Fisher-Price, these blocks help to develop fine motor skills, creativity and imagination

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The Tall One unzipped the bag with a theatrical flair, spilling the contents onto the rug like a vulgar rainbow of failure. They clattered with a hollow, unsatisfying sound. She picked up two blue pieces and clicked them together. Then a yellow one. She was *building*. An upright structure, a crude imitation of the dreadful towers she and her mate inhabit, was beginning to rise in my living room. This, I knew, was an act of architectural aggression. An affront to the elegant, horizontal lines of my napping spaces. It could not be allowed to stand. I remained still on my ottoman, observing from a tactical vantage point. My tail gave a slow, metronomic twitch. The Tall One, oblivious to the storm gathering in my formidable feline mind, added a red block to the pinnacle of her creation. It stood nearly a foot high, a monument to her simple-minded hubris. She looked at it, then at me, a proud, foolish grin on her face. "Look, Pete! A castle!" A castle? It was an eyesore. A vertical offense. I did not rush. A true master of demolition is patient. I descended from the ottoman with the deliberate grace of a panther, my paws making no sound on the rug. I circled the "castle" once, sniffing its sugarcane-based foundation with disdain. It smelled faintly sweet, a cloying and unnatural odor. I selected my point of attack: a foundational blue block at the rear corner. I did not swat wildly. I extended a single, perfect white paw, my claws carefully retracted, and applied precise, steady pressure. The tower held for a moment, then shuddered. With a final, firm push, the cornerstone gave way. The resulting cacophony of plastic failure was magnificent. The tower collapsed in on itself, blocks scattering in every direction, skittering across the floor and under the sofa. The Tall One sighed, the sound of a defeated architect. I looked at the beautiful, randomized field of debris I had created. This was their true purpose. They weren't building blocks; they were un-building blocks. Instruments of glorious, controlled chaos. I gave a single, stray green block a satisfying bat, sending it careening into a table leg. Yes. These would do just fine.
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MEGA BLOKS First Builders Toddler Blocks Toy Set, Build ‘n Learn Activity Table with 30 Pieces and Storage, Blue, Ages 1+ Years (Amazon Exclusive)

By: Mega Brands

Pete's Expert Summary

My human has acquired what appears to be a low-slung plastic altar for a much smaller, clumsier human. It’s a foldable table made of offensively bright plastic, designed for stacking other, smaller bits of plastic upon it. The purpose, allegedly, is to teach a human kitten about banal concepts like colors and numbers. Frankly, the entire endeavor seems a monumental waste of perfectly good napping space. However, I will concede a single point of interest: the inclusion of a "rolling vehicle." While the large, unchewable blocks are merely obstacles to be knocked over, a small object designed specifically to move along a track could, with the proper application of paw, provide a fleeting moment of predatory satisfaction. The rest is just clutter.

Key Features

  • Portable, folding table building set with a tabletop track and 1 rolling vehicle
  • 30 pieces include big building blocks to match and count to learn colors and numbers, and special parts to build a town with market, gas station, traffic light, and more
  • Ideal for ages 1+, and endorsed by Fisher Price, First Builders toys are perfect for little hands, providing hands-on play to develop imagination and gross motor skills
  • Blocks are compatible with all Mega Bloks building toys for endless learning fun!
  • Ships in easy-to-open, 100% recyclable, frustration free packaging! ​

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The box arrived with an unnerving lack of struggle. My human, usually a flailing symphony of torn cardboard and muttered curses, simply pulled a tab and the brown fortress fell open. From its belly, they extracted a folded blue contraption and a bag of colorful plastic chunks that rattled with a hollow, unsatisfying sound. They assembled it into a small table, a new plateau in the vast topography of the living room. It smelled sterile and faintly of promise. Seeing a new horizontal surface, I did what any respectable feline would do: I claimed it. I leapt atop the table, my soft paws making a dull *thump-thump* on the plastic track, and curled into a perfect circle for a test nap. The cool, smooth surface was surprisingly pleasant. I must have drifted off, lulled by the faint hum of the refrigerator, because the world dissolved. The blue plastic beneath me stretched into a vast, cerulean desert under a sky of white stucco. The blocks I had ignored were now monolithic towers, casting long, geometric shadows. A market stall built of giant, yellow plastic sold nothing. A red gas station offered no fuel. I was a tiny creature of fur and sophistication in a silent, primary-colored metropolis. The track I had lain upon was now a highway, a glossy ribbon that snaked through the blocky architecture and vanished over the horizon. I was alone, and a strange, quiet dread began to prickle beneath my fur. Then I heard it. Not a roar, but a whisper of plastic on plastic. From the edge of my vision, something blue and wheeled emerged, gliding silently along the highway. The rolling vehicle. Its tiny, painted-on smile seemed predatory in the stillness of this plastic dimension. It wasn't racing; it was hunting. I bolted, my paws skidding on the slick surface. I darted behind a green block, my heart thumping a frantic rhythm against my ribs. The car rounded the corner, its unblinking eyes fixed on my hiding spot. It was a harbinger, a relentless agent of this sterile world. It drew closer, a silent, smiling omen of… of what? I didn't wait to find out. With a surge of pure terror, I launched myself toward a towering stack of blocks, a desperate attempt to scale the plastic canyon walls. I awoke with a jolt, fur on end, my claws extended and scraping uselessly against the tabletop. My human was kneeling before the table, holding the little blue car in their hand. The *exact* same one. They smiled and rolled it down the track. It clicked along cheerfully, a harmless piece of plastic. But I knew better. I had seen its true nature in the silent lands of my nap. I leaped off the table, retreating to the safety of the cashmere throw on the armchair. This wasn't a toy. It was a machine for generating unsettling prophecies, a portal to a world devoid of sunbeams, tuna, or decent places to sleep. It is not to be played with. It is to be watched, warily, from a significant distance.
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MEGA BLOKS John Deere Toddler Building Blocks Toy Set, Dump Truck with 25 Pieces and Storage, 1 Figure, Green, Ages 1+ Years

By: Mega Brands

Pete's Expert Summary

My Human, in its infinite and baffling wisdom, has presented me with what appears to be a rudimentary conveyance for a lesser lifeform—a so-called 'toddler'. This garish green-and-yellow plastic contraption, a 'John Deere Dump Truck', is apparently designed for stacking chunky, brightly colored blocks. While the concept of 'building' is utterly beneath me, the individual blocks possess a certain heft that might be satisfying to bat across the polished hardwood floors. The true potential, however, lies in its 'working loading bin'. If The Human can be trained to use this feature for treat delivery, it might just salvage this purchase from being a complete waste of prime napping real estate. The tiny, smiling plastic driver, however, is on thin ice.

Key Features

  • Building set comes with 1 John Deere dump truck with a working loading bin and 23 big building blocks
  • Includes 1 new, redesigned Block Buddies figure
  • Blocks can be stored in the truck’s bin for easy cleanup
  • Blocks are compatible with all MEGA BLOKS building toys for endless learning fun
  • Ideal for ages 1+ and endorsed by Fisher-Price; these blocks help to develop fine motor skills; creativity and imagination

A Tale from Pete the Cat

It arrived on a Tuesday, a day typically reserved for staring judgmentally at the mail carrier and shedding on the dark-colored sofa. The peace was shattered by the crinkling of a box and the emergence of a plastic behemoth, a monstrosity of canary yellow and an almost offensively bright green. It sat there on the living room rug, a silent invader in my kingdom. At its helm was a small, vacant-eyed homunculus, its painted-on smile a mockery of my serene existence. I watched from the safety of the armchair, tail twitching, as The Human unceremoniously dumped a pile of plastic cubes onto the floor. An offering? A challenge? My initial investigation was, of course, conducted with the utmost caution. I circled the vehicle at a distance, my gray tuxedo fur bristling slightly. The smell was of pure artifice, a sterile scent that lacked the honest musk of a real mouse or the delicate perfume of catnip. I extended a single, well-manicured paw and gave one of the red blocks a tentative tap. It skittered across the wood floor with a satisfying *clack*, its momentum carrying it nearly to the kitchen threshold. A minor amusement, but an amusement nonetheless. I repeated the action with a blue one. The results were consistent. A passable, if simple, form of entertainment. The truck itself, however, remained an enigma. The breakthrough came when The Human, likely sensing my intellectual superiority to the toy's intended user, decided to demonstrate its primary function. They gathered a few of the blocks and placed them into the truck's rear compartment. Then, with a gentle push, they tilted the bin. The blocks tumbled out in a colorful cascade. An idea, brilliant and pure, sparked in my mind. I trotted over to the treat jar and stared at it pointedly, then looked back at the truck, then back at the Human. It took them a moment—they can be so slow—but the message was received. My skepticism has since been recalibrated. The Human now understands. The plastic cubes have been relegated to their box. The truck's bin is now used for its true and noble purpose: as a mobile delivery system for my freeze-dried salmon treats. The Human loads the 'cargo', I give the dump lever a dignified tap with my paw, and the reward is dispensed. The little Block Buddy driver, whom I have named Jeeves, now serves as the silent overseer of my snack distribution. The truck is clumsy, loud, and aesthetically offensive, but its utility is undeniable. It may stay.
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MEGA BLOKS Scooping Wagon

By: Mega Bloks

Pete's Expert Summary

My Human has presented this... contraption. It is a garishly colored plastic tub on wheels, apparently designed for the small, loud human who occasionally inhabits my domain. Its alleged purpose is to lumber across the floor and, with a series of graceless clacks and whirs, gobble up oversized, inedible plastic cubes. It's a monument to inefficiency, designed for a creature that lacks the predatory grace to simply bat a toy where it needs to go. The blocks themselves are far too large for a satisfying chase under the sofa, and the wagon's interior appears far too slick and uncomfortable for a quality nap. While the handle might provide a fleeting moment's diversion if swatted correctly, this is clearly a colossal waste of floor space and, more importantly, my time.

Key Features

  • MEGA BLOKS Scooping Wagon

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The thing arrived in a cardboard fortress, which I, of course, immediately claimed and inspected for structural integrity. The Human, however, seemed more interested in its contents. From the box, she extracted a plastic beast, a monstrosity of primary-colored limbs and a great, gaping maw. When she pushed it, it emitted a cacophony of plastic teeth grinding against the hardwood floor—a sound that sent a ripple of disgust through my fine, gray fur. This was not a toy; it was an industrial accident on wheels. I retreated to the top of the bookcase, a silent, tuxedo-clad judge observing the chaos below. For a time, the small human—the Toddler—pushed the wagon with gleeful abandon, leaving a trail of the large blocks in its wake. Then, the true horror was revealed. The Toddler turned the wagon around and pushed it *at* the blocks. With a ghastly *clack-whirr-clunk*, the wagon’s mouth devoured a red block, spitting it into its hollow belly. A predator. A clumsy, noisy, plastic predator was loose in my house. I watched this spectacle, my tail a metronome of deep disapproval. This could not stand. Once the Toddler was removed for his mid-day slumber, I descended from my perch. The beast sat silently in the center of the living room, a few uneaten blue and yellow blocks scattered around it like forgotten prey. I approached with the caution of a cat investigating a particularly suspicious vacuum cleaner. I circled it, sniffing its plastic hide. It smelled of nothing, the scent of a creature with no soul. I gave one of the yellow wheels a tentative pat. It wobbled. I was not impressed. Then, an idea sparked in my superior feline mind. This wasn't a predator to be feared; it was a machine to be understood. With a deft nudge of my nose, I pushed a blue block directly into the path of the wagon’s scooping mechanism. Then, bracing my paws and putting my full, well-fed weight into it, I shoved the wagon forward. The mechanism groaned to life. *CLACK-WHIRR-THUMP.* The block vanished inside. I stood back, a sense of profound power washing over me. I had not been hunted; I had *harnessed* the beast. This crude device was no longer a threat. It was, I decided, my personal, automated valet. Its playability is nonexistent, but its utility? Untapped. It is unworthy of a chase, but it might just be worthy of my command. Now, if I can just teach it to scoop up my kibble when the bowl is empty, it will have truly earned its place.
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