A photo of Pete the cat

Pete's Toy Box: Blocks

MEGA BLOKS First Builders Toddler Blocks Toys Set, Big Building Bag with 80 Pieces and Storage, Blue, Ages 1+ Years

By: Mega Brands

Pete's Expert Summary

Ah, the Human presents me with a large, crinkly sack of what appears to be brightly colored plastic chunks. They call them "Mega Bloks," and I'm told they are for "toddlers," a creature I understand to be a small, clumsy human with poor motor skills and a penchant for shrieking. The appeal, I suppose, is in their size and clatter-potential. For a being of my refined intellect, stacking them seems a tedious chore. However, their light weight and varied shapes suggest they could be ideal for knocking over whatever architectural monstrosities the Human attempts to build. The true prize, as is so often the case, is likely the packaging—that soft, pliable bag looks like a first-rate napping location once I've supervised the emptying of its mundane contents.

Key Features

  • The #1 Junior Construction Toy Worldwide Features 80 blocks in 10 shapes and 9 vibrant colors
  • Build Them Up Big Building Bag is designed for little hands and growing minds
  • Creative Learning Play Toddlers can build anything they imagine and learn colors
  • Compatible with Other Name Brands Combine stacking toys for endless big building fun
  • For Preschoolers Ages 1+ - Big blocks help to develop creativity, imagination, and fine motor skills

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The Human unzipped the bag with a theatrical flourish, spilling a garish avalanche of primary-colored plastic onto my favorite sunning rug. My tail gave a single, dismissive flick. They were blocks. Inert, soulless things. The Human, with the misguided enthusiasm of their species, began stacking them. A tower of sorts began to rise—a clumsy, asymmetrical spire of blue, red, and a particularly offensive shade of yellow. It was an affront to the very principles of architectural integrity. It leaned. It wobbled. It was, in short, an eyesore in my otherwise impeccably curated domain. I watched from the arm of the sofa, a silent, gray-furred critic. The Human added a green block, then a red one, their structure growing more precarious with each addition. They looked at me, a foolish grin on their face, as if expecting praise for this monument to mediocrity. I yawned, a deliberate, slow gesture meant to convey my profound boredom. This was not play. This was manual labor, and the result was an insult to gravity itself. The tower stood, a silent challenge to the natural order of things, an order in which I, Pete, am the final arbiter. With the fluid grace only a feline can possess, I descended from my perch. I did not rush. I padded slowly, circling the plastic monstrosity. I surveyed its base, its staggered layers, its teetering peak. The Human watched, holding their breath. They thought I was coming to play their simple game. They were wrong. I was here to perform a public service. I identified the key structural weakness—a single, ill-placed blue block near the bottom. I extended a single claw, not out of aggression, but with the precision of a surgeon. A gentle *tap*. The resulting cascade was magnificent. The tower collapsed into a sprawling, chaotic field of color that was, I had to admit, far more artistically interesting than the original structure. The clattering symphony was a satisfying reward for my efforts. The Human laughed, misunderstanding my act of aesthetic correction as simple destruction. Let them laugh. They can build their towers, and I will be the force of nature that returns them to a more pleasing state of entropy. The blocks themselves are tiresome, but as a medium for teaching the Human about the futility of their efforts? They are sublime.

Melissa & Doug Wooden Building Blocks Set - 100 Blocks in 4 Colors and 9 Shapes Classic Kids Toys, Colored Wood For Toddlers Ages 2+ - FSC-Certified

By: Melissa & Doug

Pete's Expert Summary

It seems the human has procured a box of what I can only describe as brightly colored, processed tree segments. These "Melissa & Doug" blocks, one hundred of them in various shapes and hues, are apparently intended for clumsy, miniature humans to stack and, presumably, drool on. From my perspective, their potential is twofold. Firstly, the satisfying *clatter* a well-built tower will make when I introduce it to the laws of gravity is promising. Secondly, a single, well-swatted block could skitter beautifully across the hardwood floor, providing a decent chase before inevitably ending up lost under the heaviest piece of furniture. On their own, they are inert and pointless; as a catalyst for chaos, they might just be worth a flick of my tail.

Key Features

  • 100 solid wood building blocks perfect for hours (and towers!) of fun
  • These building toy blocks come in 4 colors and 9 shapes
  • Ideal for building and introducing early math concepts
  • Engaging with the Melissa & Doug wooden building blocks set is a classic creative and educational activity
  • Brightly colored wooden building blocks set makes a great gift for toddlers and preschoolers, ages 2 to 5, for hands-on, screen-free play; product made with FSC-certified materials that support responsible forestry; applies to new inventory only (FSC C156584)

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The edifice was an affront to good taste. My human, with the focused yet misguided determination of a squirrel burying a single nut in a vast forest, was stacking the wooden blocks in the middle of my sunbeam. A gaudy tower of primary-colored geometry rose from the rug, a monument to architectural incompetence. Red cylinders were precariously balanced on blue bridges, yellow cubes formed a weak foundation, and green triangles served as pointless, unstable little hats. I watched from the arm of the sofa, my tail twitching not with excitement, but with profound aesthetic offense. This... this *thing* could not be allowed to stand. It disrupted the harmonious flow of the room. I descended from my perch with the fluid grace of smoke. I did not rush. This was not a frenzied attack; it was a deconstruction. I circled the structure, my paws silent on the plush fibers of the rug. I noted the slight wobble in the third tier, the foolhardy placement of a rectangular block that provided the main support for the entire top half. The human cooed, "Look, Pete! Isn't it a pretty castle?" A castle? Please. It was a brightly-colored slum, and I was the zoning board. My approach was surgical. Ignoring the tempting, wobbly top, I lowered my head and selected my target: a single, foundational yellow cube. A lesser feline would have batted at the whole structure, a brutish and inefficient method. I, however, simply extended a single, perfect claw and hooked it into the grain of the wood. With a gentle but firm tug, I slid the cube from its position. For a moment, a beautiful, silent moment, the tower hung in the air, defying physics through sheer ignorance. Then came the glorious cascade. It was not a crash, but a symphony of percussive sounds. The light *clack* of wood on wood, the heavier *thump* as the base scattered, the final, satisfying *pitter-patter* of the smaller pieces raining down. The human sighed. I, however, felt a sense of peace. Order was restored. I sniffed at the wreckage, selected a particularly smooth green cylinder, and with a swift flick of my paw, sent it skittering into the dark abyss beneath the television stand. A worthy tribute. The blocks themselves were unremarkable, but as a tool for teaching my human about the simple, elegant beauty of entropy? Exquisite.

MEGA BLOKS First Builders Toddler Blocks Toys Set, Deluxe Building Bag with 150 Pieces and Storage, Blue, Ages 1+ Years

By: Mega Brands

Pete's Expert Summary

It seems The Human has acquired a large, crinkly sack filled with 150 garishly colored plastic chunks. They call them 'MEGA BLOKS,' and they are clearly intended for the small, shrieking variety of human, not a sophisticated creature such as myself. The blocks themselves are far too large to be satisfyingly chased or carried off as trophies, and their hollow plastic nature offers none of the tactile pleasure of, say, a wool dryer ball or a stolen silk ribbon. However, their sheer number promises a delightful level of household chaos, and the potential for a well-placed bat to send a tower crashing down is not without its appeal. The true prize, I suspect, is the capacious storage bag, which might, with some modification, serve as a rather fine ambush location.

Key Features

  • First Blocks in Home Features 150 big building blocks including special shapes
  • Build Them Up Deluxe Building Bag is designed for little hands and growing minds
  • Creative Learning Play Toddlers can build anything they imagine and learn colors
  • Compatible with other MEGA BLOKS sets Combine stacking toys for endless big building fun
  • For Preschoolers Ages 1+ - Big blocks help to develop creativity, imagination, and fine motor skills

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The invasion began without warning. The Human unzipped a large, offensively blue bag, and from its canvas maw spilled a plastic flood that desecrated the living room rug. A cascade of primary-colored rectangles and squares, clicking and clacking with a cheapness that offended my delicate ears. I watched from the safety of the armchair, my tail a metronome of pure irritation, as the Small Human began to erect crude, unstable towers. This was not a toy. This was an architectural blight, an unwelcome colonization of my sovereign territory. Later, under the cloak of night, I descended to survey the damage. The blocks were scattered like the ruins of a forgotten, tasteless civilization. As I navigated the treacherous new landscape, my paw nudged a long, blue piece. Then another. An idea, sharp and brilliant, pierced my cynical gloom. This was not a mess. This was a new topography, a world awaiting a ruler. The humans saw building blocks; I saw the foundation of an empire. The next morning, my work began. I was no longer a mere house cat; I was a cartographer, a pioneer. That line of blue blocks became the Great River, a boundary I would patrol with regal authority. The haphazard pile of yellow and green blocks was transformed into the Sunstone Plateau, an ideal spot for my mid-morning nap, offering a commanding view of the domain. I nudged and repositioned key pieces, not to build, but to define. This was my land, my plastic archipelago. The humans remain oblivious. They see their small offspring playing, stacking blocks into teetering, nonsensical structures. They do not see the intricate borders I have established, the strategic territories I have claimed. Let them build their temporary follies. When they are done, I will stroll through my kingdom, the undisputed master of this colorful new continent. The blocks themselves are worthless, but the world they create? Priceless.

B. toys – Baby Blocks – Stacking & Building Toys For Babies – 10 Soft & Educational Blocks- Numbers, Shapes, Colors, Animals- One Two Squeeze- 6 Months +

By: B. toys

Pete's Expert Summary

My human has procured a set of soft, yielding cubes, ostensibly for the smaller, less-furry creature that now cohabitates my domain. These blocks are covered in what I can only assume are remedial illustrations of lesser animals and rudimentary human symbols, clearly intended for an undeveloped mind. The muted, "modern" colors are an offense to anyone with a sophisticated palate. While the concept of 'education' is entirely lost on me, the soft, chewable texture holds a certain appeal for a light claw-sharpening or a satisfying bite when the food bowl is scandalously empty. However, the true prize here is not the blocks, which will inevitably be coated in drool, but the recycled fabric sack they arrived in; it shows immense promise as a future ambush point or a five-star napping den.

Key Features

  • Baby Blocks: 10 soft and squeezable building blocks with modern colors and embossed designs.
  • Learning Toy: These educational blocks feature numbers 1 through 10, different animals, shapes, and colors.
  • Developmental Playset: These colorful and textured blocks can improve sensory development and fine motor skills.
  • Reusable Bag: Put the baby blocks in our B.eautiful bag made out of 100% recycled fabric and grab 'em on-the-go.
  • Age: These toys are recommended for babies 6 months plus

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The bag was the first offense. It was unzipped with a theatrical flourish, revealing ten cubes of muted, vaguely pastel rubber. They smelled faintly of plastic and false hope. The Human took them out, cooing at the Small Noisy One, and began to stack them. "Look!" the Human chirped, "A tower for you!" A tower. It was a pathetic, three-block-high structure that listed to one side like a sailor on shore leave. I observed this pathetic display from my spot on the rug, my tail twitching in profound irritation. My nap had been disturbed for *this*? My initial plan was simple: a swift, powerful strike to send the blocks scattering, a demonstration of the folly of gravity and the superiority of feline-induced chaos. I stalked forward, my gray tuxedo immaculate against the beige carpet. I raised a paw to execute the swat of doom, but as I made contact with the bottom block—the one with the ridiculous-looking elephant embossed on its side—something unexpected happened. It didn't clatter. It didn't slide. It *squished*. It yielded to my paw with a soft, wheezing sigh, a pathetic little squeak of surrender. This changed everything. This wasn't a toy to be destroyed; this was a material to be manipulated. A challenge not of demolition, but of conquest. Ignoring the Human's continued babbling, I carefully placed my front paws onto the first block, then hoisted myself onto the second. The embossed numbers and shapes provided an excellent, if somewhat undignified, grip for my claws. The entire structure wobbled precariously, but the soft material absorbed the movement. I was an intrepid mountaineer scaling a new, colorful, and slightly squeaky peak. Upon reaching the summit—a ghastly mustard-yellow block—I settled my full, luxurious weight upon it. It compressed beneath me, creating a custom-molded throne. From this new, slightly elevated perch, I had a superior vantage point for observing the kitchen entrance. The blocks themselves are an insult to aesthetics and intelligence. But as a modular, fully adjustable dais from which I can survey my kingdom and silently judge my staff? For this purpose, and this purpose alone, they are… acceptable. The squeak is the sound of my enemies' lamentations.

Melissa & Doug Deluxe Wooden ABC/123 1-Inch Blocks Set With Storage Pouch (50 pcs), Classic Letter And Number Wooden Blocks, For Toddlers And Kids Ages 2+

By: Melissa & Doug

Pete's Expert Summary

My human seems to have mistaken our home for a preschool. These are fifty small, wooden cubes from Melissa & Doug, a brand I associate with the sticky-fingered, less-articulate variety of human. They are painted with loud colors and primitive symbols—letters and numbers, apparently—designed for "learning" and "stacking." While the educational value is entirely lost on me (I am already a genius), I must concede their potential. A one-inch cube possesses a certain heft, a pleasing density perfect for being batted across a hardwood floor. The real prize, however, might be the storage pouch; a soft, contained space is never to be underestimated. Still, the primary function seems to be constructing rudimentary towers, which is, frankly, an open invitation for me to practice my demolition skills.

Key Features

  • 50 traditionally styled one-inch wooden alphabet blocks
  • Colorful collection of pictures, letters, and numbers
  • Perfect for word recognition, matching, stacking, and sorting
  • Exceptional quality
  • Makes a great gift for toddlers and preschoolers, ages 2 to 5, for hands-on, screen-free play

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The box arrived not for me, but for the "Nephew," a small, loud human who visits on occasion and smells faintly of yogurt and desperation. I watched from my perch on the armchair as the Human unboxed the fifty wooden cubes, their clean, woody scent cutting through the air. The Nephew proceeded to do what small humans do: bang them together, attempt to eat one, and then arrange them into a wobbly, architecturally unsound tower that offended my sense of order. I feigned sleep, a classic maneuver, observing the travesty through slitted eyes. Later, long after the Nephew had been bundled away, the house fell silent. The moon cast long shadows across the living room, illuminating the lone tower of blocks, a garish monument to toddler ambition. I descended from my chair, my paws silent on the rug. I circled the structure. It was absurd. Red on blue, 'C' on '7', a duck next to a triangle. A chaotic jumble of concepts that had no business cohabitating. It was an insult to gravity itself. There was no thrill of the hunt here, no primal urge to pounce. This was an intellectual exercise. A problem that needed solving. I extended a single, perfect gray paw, my white cuff immaculate in the dim light. I didn't swat. I didn't pounce. I *pushed*. A deliberate, calculated nudge at the base of the tower, on the corner of a yellow block marked with the number '3'. For a moment, it resisted. Then, a slow, magnificent lean began. It was followed by a cascade of wooden clicks and clacks, a percussive masterpiece that echoed beautifully in the quiet room. The blocks scattered, rolling to a stop in a beautifully random, non-tower configuration. The universe was, once again, in balance. I did not chase the scattered blocks. That would be beneath me. Their purpose was singular and had been fulfilled. I sniffed one—'Q'—and gave it a look of disdain before turning my attention to the soft, empty pouch left on the floor. I kneaded it twice before curling up inside its cozy confines. The blocks were not a toy; they were a tool for enforcing entropy. A worthy, if simple, addition to my kingdom, useful for the occasional, necessary act of creative destruction.

LEGO Classic Large Creative Brick Box 10698 Building Toy Set, Toy Storage Solution for Home or Classrooms, Interactive Building Toy for Kids, Boys, and Girls

By: LEGO

Pete's Expert Summary

My human seems to believe that my life, a carefully curated cycle of napping, judging, and demanding sustenance, is somehow lacking in "creative stimulation." Their solution is this... a large, garish yellow box filled with 790 tiny, hard plastic rectangles in 33 offensively bright colors. They call them "LEGOs." Apparently, one is meant to construct things like houses and scooters. While the box itself presents a promising napping platform, the contents seem designed for the sole purpose of being scattered across the floor, creating a minefield for bare human feet in the middle of the night. The small wheels might offer a brief moment of chase-worthy diversion, but ultimately, these are just bits of colored plastic. Their true value, I suspect, lies in their ability to get lost under furniture, providing a long-term project for my humans to search for while I watch from a comfortable perch.

Key Features

  • Engage your kids in pretend play by letting them build their own play toys, such as creating a toy house or toy scooter. This classic creative kit of LEGO bricks comes includes 33 different colors of bricks
  • This brick box includes 8 different types of toy windows and toy doors, 2 green baseplates and 6 toy tires and toy wheel rims to create hours of creativity for kids
  • Kids will become creative builders as they use these color toys to build a figure or build a castle while also engaging in kids playtime
  • The large build and play LEGO Creative Brick toy playset is compatible with all LEGO construction sets for never-ending creative play
  • The green baseplates in this build it yourself set measure over 6-inch long and 6-inch wide, and 4-inch long and 2-inch respectively. Kids will get to build and play with 790 pieces and is ideal for boys and girls of any age
  • The LEGO inspired packaging serves as toy storage solution for home or classrooms

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The offering was presented with the usual fanfare reserved for things I have no interest in. A giant, yellow plastic sarcophagus was placed on the living room floor. I circled it once, my tail twitching. The box itself was magnificent—sturdy, with clean lines and a satisfyingly smooth lid. A prime piece of real estate. I was already planning the inaugural nap when the human committed the ultimate betrayal: they opened it. A sound like a thousand tiny plastic skeletons falling down a staircase filled the room. Out poured a cascade of colored bits, an insult to the elegant gray-and-white aesthetic of the home, and more importantly, of myself. My human began to assemble the pieces with the rapt attention of a true simpleton. They clicked and pressed, forming what they declared a "delightful little cottage." It was hideous. It had tiny, useless windows and a door a mouse would find cramped. I watched from the arm of the sofa, feigning sleep but secretly cataloging every flaw. This was not a toy. It was an exercise in futility, a monument to bad taste. I was about to dismiss the entire affair and demand a treat for my troubles when I saw it. The human had attached six small, black "tires" to a flat green piece, creating a rudimentary vehicle. They gave it a gentle push. It didn't just move; it glided. It whispered across the hardwood floor with a smoothness that defied its clunky origin. My predator brain, long dormant under layers of pampering and cynicism, flickered to life. I descended from my throne in a single, fluid motion. I stalked this strange, six-wheeled prey, my body low to the ground. A single, surgical tap of my paw sent it skittering away. It was a challenge. Not a loud, obnoxious jingle-ball, but a silent, worthy adversary that tested my speed and precision. The human, of course, entirely missed the point. They saw my interest and began building more elaborate structures, towers and bridges, all of which I ignored. My focus was singular. I became a ghost in the night, a silent hunter of plastic wheels. I would wait until the house was quiet, locate the wheeled contraptions they had built, and "liberate" the tires. I did not chew them or destroy them. I simply collected them, creating a secret stash behind the dryer. The building blocks were a distraction, a colorful mess for the clumsy giant. But the wheels? The wheels were worthy. They understood the elegant purity of the chase. The toy, as a whole, is a failure. But its component parts have provided me with a new, noble purpose: I am a connoisseur of perfect, silent rolling.

edxeducation Linking Cubes | Set of 100 | Counting Cubes | Color Sorting Toys | Math Manipulatives for Preschoolers, Pre K

By: edxeducation

Pete's Expert Summary

My human seems to have procured a large supply of small, brightly colored plastic squares, allegedly for the educational torment of a juvenile human. They call them "math manipulatives." I call them "things to bat under the refrigerator." The sheer quantity is notable—one hundred identical units provides ample opportunity for widespread distribution across all floor surfaces. Their reported durability and lack of sharp edges mean they should stand up to my rigorous quality testing, which involves both teeth and claws. While the concept of "linking" them together seems like a tedious chore best left to those with opposable thumbs, their 0.8-inch size is simply perfect for a satisfying paw-thwack, sending them skittering across the hardwood. It might be worth interrupting a nap to investigate their trajectory potential.

Key Features

  • CLEVER DESIGN -- These counters snap together with an easy "click" and apart with a soft “pop”. They're ideal fine motor, construction and creative sorting toys for toddlers 3-5.
  • HIGH QUALITY -- Made with thick plastic, the counting cubes contain more raw material than other math linking cubes on the market. This makes the blocks more durable plus there are no sharp edges!
  • DESIGNED FOR SMALL HANDS -- With 0.8" or 2 cm sides, these color sorting sensory toys are an ideal size for small hands to manipulate.
  • 10 BRIGHT COLORS -- Watch as your youngster learns the art of pattern making, sorting games or building their own 3D creations. These manipulatives are ideal for preschool math, too!
  • INSPIRE DISCOVERY-BASED PLAY -- Linking Cubes connect on all 6 sides, which means endless connecting possibilities. Encourage problem solving, counting, construction, creativity and early sorting.
  • TEACH EARLY MATH -- Use these linking cubes to teach math concepts such as: addition, subtraction, counting, geometry, measurement, problem solving and reasoning.
  • PLAY, LEARN & CREATE -- Our products inspire children to play with purpose. Play is the best teacher! Our high-quality, educational resources fulfill learning needs up to 12 years.

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The human, my bumbling Quartermaster, emptied the container onto the rug. A cascade of colored plastic, a hundred new recruits for my war against household boredom. They were supposedly for a small, visiting human, but I am the true arbiter of all objects that enter my domain. I am General Pete, and this was my morning inspection. I stepped delicately among the scattered troops, my pristine white paws a stark contrast to their garish primary colors. Reds for the vanguard, blues for the rearguard, yellows for... well, for knocking off the coffee table. I nudged a green one with my nose. It felt solid, dense. None of this flimsy, hollow nonsense I’ve come to expect. This was materiel of quality. My Quartermaster, in a moment of baffling insight, picked up two and pressed them together. *CLICK*. The sound was sharp, authoritative. The sound of a weapon being readied. I watched, my tail giving a slow, deliberate twitch. She had just demonstrated their primary tactical function: forming a phalanx. When she left the room, my campaign began. I selected a red cube, the most aggressive color, and pinned it to the rug with one paw. I brought a blue cube down upon it. *CLICK*. They were locked. I added a yellow, a green, a black. *CLICK. CLICK. CLICK.* I was not building a mere wall; I was forging a spearhead. A multi-colored battering ram, five units long, perfectly weighted and ready for an assault on the enticingly wobbly leg of the ficus plant in the corner. This was no mere toy; this was an arsenal. My initial disdain for these "educational" blocks melted away. They were not for learning subtraction; they were for strategic deployment. Their ability to connect on all six sides offered limitless tactical possibilities. I could construct barricades, mobile assault towers, or simply leave individual units scattered like landmines for the soft-footed humans to discover in the dead of night. They are not only worthy of my attention, they are essential to my plans for total domestic supremacy. The campaign is afoot.

OOOK 100pcs Building Blocks for Toddlers 1-3, Wooden Blocks for Kids with Storage Bucket and Shape Sorter Lid, Montessori Toys for 1 2 3 Year Old, Learning Toys for Preschool Girls and Boys

By: OOOK

Pete's Expert Summary

Ah, another offering from the giants who rule this house. This appears to be a bucket filled with a hundred small, colorful wooden objects of various geometric persuasions, made by a brand called "OOOK," which sounds like the noise a human makes when they stub a toe. It's supposedly for "toddlers," those miniature, unpredictable humans, to "learn" by stacking and sorting. For me, the appeal is not in the stacking, but in the un-stacking. The sheer quantity of pieces presents a glorious opportunity for wide-scale dispersal under furniture and into hard-to-reach corners. The bucket might make a decent napping vessel if I can empty it of its noisy, angular contents, but the lid with its strange-shaped holes is an unnecessary complication. A potential catalyst for chaos, but hardly a sophisticated toy for a feline of my caliber.

Key Features

  • Montessori Toys for Kids - The toddler blocks set comes in 5 colors and 11 different shapes totally 100pcs, which allows kids to build castles, parks, rockets, cars, bridges or whatever they like with imagination and creativity
  • Nice Storage Bucket - Toddler block set is assorted with a bucket for easy storage and portability. The shape sorter on lid makes it more fun for kids to sort wooden blocks, promote skills of color and shape identification and develop good storage habits
  • Safe for Toddlers - The building blocks for toddlers 3-5 are made of solid wood with water-based paint, colorful and safe. Each block comes with rounded edges and smooth surfaces. Larger block sizes keep kids safe from choking hazards
  • Play and Learn - Wooden stacking block for toddlers have always been an indispensable toy for growing up. Toddlers build different styles with imagination and creativity while promoting color recognition, shape matching, stacking and sorting skills
  • Early Learning Tools - Building blocks are essential Montessori toys which positively promote kids' development in any setting and upbringing, home or school. The ideal present for 1 2 3 year old boys and girls

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The thing arrived in a large, uninteresting cylinder. My Human, with that hopeful glint in her eye she gets when she thinks she's found "the one," unscrewed the top and tipped it over. The sound was not the delicate crinkle of a new bag of treats, nor the promising squeak of a faux-mouse. It was a cacophony, a wooden waterfall of clattering, clicking, and thudding as one hundred small, brightly-painted blocks tumbled onto the rug. I, observing from my post on the back of the sofa, remained unimpressed. They smelled of wood and disappointment. My Human began her strange ritual, stacking the blocks one upon the other. A red cube, a blue rectangle, a yellow cylinder. It was a monument to futility, a tower of Babel built from sheer boredom. She cooed at it, as if it had accomplished something. I twitched an ear. The structure grew, teetering precariously. It offended my sense of architectural integrity. Who builds with a cylinder as a foundation? An amateur. I watched, my gray tail a slow, metronomic pendulum of judgment, as she added a green arch near the top. An flourish of hubris. She turned her back for a mere moment, distracted by the chiming of her pocket rectangle. It was all the time a master requires. I didn't rush. I descended from the sofa with the liquid grace of smoke, my white paws making no sound on the floor. I did not stalk this tower; I appraised it, like a food critic examining a poorly prepared dish. I selected my tool—a single, errant orange triangle lying nearby. With a flick of my paw, I sent it skittering across the floor. It was a perfect shot, a bank off the leg of the coffee table that sent the projectile directly into the tower's weak, cylindrical base. The collapse was magnificent. It was a symphony of destruction, a colorful explosion that sent blocks skittering into every conceivable hiding place under the sun. The Human sighed that familiar, long-suffering sigh. I, however, was satisfied. I located a particularly satisfying purple semi-circle, batted it once to confirm its excellent skitter-factor, and then nonchalantly began cleaning a pristine white paw. This is no toy. It is a system. A system for generating delightful, widespread messes and for teaching my Human a valuable lesson in the ephemeral nature of all her silly little constructions. It is, in its own chaotic way, a masterpiece. Approved.

Ms. Rachel Melissa & Doug Letter, Number, and Game Wooden Learning Blocks with Activity Cards for Girls and Boys Toddlers Ages 18 Months+ - FSC-Certified

By: Melissa & Doug

Pete's Expert Summary

So, the human has procured yet another box of objects for the small, loud human—the one they call a "toddler." This one comes from Melissa & Doug, a brand I grudgingly respect for its commitment to solid, chewable wood rather than that ghastly, chemical-scented plastic. These appear to be wooden cubes, or "blocks," covered in archaic symbols and pictures, ostensibly for "learning." I suppose the small one could use the help. For me, their primary appeal lies in their density and potential for gravitational experiments from high shelves. The embossed letters might offer a satisfying texture for a cheek rub, but the accompanying paper "activity cards" are clearly just inferior-quality placemats for me to shed upon. It seems a tolerable diversion, provided I can claim the best ones before they get gummed up.

Key Features

  • Stack, match, roll, and learn with 30 wooden letter, number, picture, and activity learning blocks and 14 double-sided activity cards, inspired by educator Ms. Rachel’s popular baby and toddler videos
  • Includes 26 embossed wooden blocks with upper- and lowercase letters of the alphabet, pictures that begin with or highlight each letter, and numbers 1-26; 4 activity blocks for interactive games (animals, emotions, parts of the body, movement); and 14 double-sided activity cards
  • Cards feature letter, number, and color matching activities, games, different ways to play with the blocks to support learning in a fun way, and developmental skill information and tips
  • Created by Ms. Rachel and developmental experts to help children reach important milestones in the crucial early years of learning; learning blocks and activities are great for helping kids build communication, cognitive, and motor skills
  • Designed to support all children through their ages and stages, from 18 months to 3 years and beyond; product made with FSC-certified materials that support responsible forestry; applies to new inventory only (FSC C156584)

A Tale from Pete the Cat

The box was opened with the kind of fanfare usually reserved for a particularly succulent tin of tuna. My human cooed, pulling out a block of pale wood. "Look, Pete! It's from Ms. Rachel!" I blinked slowly, offering no reaction to the meaningless name. The small human, however, shrieked with a glee that rattled my sensitive ears and began slamming the blocks together with the finesse of a falling armoire. I retreated to the arm of the sofa to observe the sacrilege. They were good blocks; I could tell by the solid *thud* they made. The wood was smooth, the corners rounded, and the scent was a pleasant, earthy perfume of responsible forestry, not the usual factory floor sweepings. For an hour, I watched the predictable cycle of stack-and-destroy. It was a bore. Just as I was about to drift into a well-deserved nap, the small human was carried away for its own forced slumber, leaving the battlefield of blocks scattered across the rug. My moment had arrived. I hopped down, my paws silent on the plush fibers, and began my inspection. I nudged a block with my nose. It had a "B" on it, and a picture of a bee. Uninspired. Another had an "S" and a snake. Derivative. I was about to declare the entire enterprise a failure when my paw brushed against a block that felt different. It was one of the "activity" blocks. I turned it over. One side had a drawing of a sleeping face. Another, a crying face. A third, a smiling face. And the fourth... the fourth had a face with its tongue sticking out, a look of pure, unadulterated mockery. I stared at it. It stared back. This, I understood. This was art. This was a commentary on the absurdity of existence, a tiny wooden monument to insolence. I had found my totem. The letters and numbers were tedious primers for the babbling human, but this single, perfect cube captured a truth far more profound. I picked it up delicately in my mouth—a feat of dexterity my human fails to appreciate—and carried it not to my food bowl, nor to my bed, but to the very center of the expensive living room rug. I placed the block down carefully, the mocking face aimed squarely at the ceiling, a silent challenge to the universe. Let the small one learn its alphabet. I had found philosophy. These blocks were not merely playable; one of them, at least, was essential. It would be my companion in silent judgment of this household. Worthy, indeed.