Pete's Expert Summary
So, my human has embarked on a new project, apparently sourced from that "Shark Tank" show they watch, where other humans beg for money. This "Woobles" kit is supposed to turn them into a master of yarn arts. It comes with a special, non-fraying yarn, which is a personal affront to my instincts, and a hook for tangling it into a specific shape. The goal, it seems, is to construct a small, yellow effigy of a chick named "Kiki." While I appreciate the potential for a new victim for my midnight rampages, I am deeply skeptical that my human, whose primary skill is operating the can opener, can fashion anything more complex than a knot. It all seems like a tremendous amount of effort just to produce one small, lumpy toy that I will inevitably lose under the refrigerator.
Key Features
- 🧶 CROCHET KIT FOR COMPLETE BEGINNERS: Kiki the Chick is the perfect crochet kit for complete beginners; Our step-by-step video tutorial accompanies Kiki and is easy to follow; A pre-started crochet piece comes included along with other beginner-friendly supplies
- 🧶 EVERYTHING YOU NEED: Along with Easy Peasy Yarn and easy-to-follow video tutorials, you'll receive every other tool you'd need to begin crocheting with our kits; Kiki the Chick also comes with pre-started yarn, eyes, a yarn needle, a crochet hook, stuffing, and a bag that holds it all
- 🧶 EASY-TO-FOLLOW VIDEO TUTORIALS: Our step-by-step videos for both right and left-handed users guide beginners from start to finish; They're easy to follow thanks to a detailed explanation behind each stage of the learning process; The Woobles also offers unlimited help over e-mail and text, plus virtual crochet office hours
- 🧶 CUSTOM-MADE YARN: The Woobles Easy Peasy Yarn is made in-house, especially for beginners; Only available at The Woobles; Easy to crochet with and makes it easy to see your stitches throughout
- 🧶 LEARN THE WOOBLES WAY: Thousands of people have learned to crochet The Woobles way––you could be next; Our beginner-level crochet kits make it easy to pick up this new hobby; Try Felix the Fox, Pierre the Penguin, and more today
A Tale from Pete the Cat
The ritual began on a Tuesday. My human laid out the contents of the box like artifacts for a strange summoning. There was a skein of unnervingly smooth yellow yarn, a gleaming metal hook that looked suspiciously like an instrument of torment, and two black plastic beads that stared into the void. Most unnerving of all was the "pre-started" piece—a small, coiled spiral of yarn, proof that this dark magic was already in motion before it even entered my domain. I watched from the arm of the velvet chaise, my tail a metronome of cynical judgment, as the human propped up a glowing tablet and submitted to the will of the disembodied voice instructing her from within. Her hands, usually so adept at scratching behind my ears, moved with the clumsy uncertainty of a newborn kitten. She fumbled with the hook, tangled the yarn, and muttered incantations I've heard her use when the Wi-Fi goes out. The voice from the tablet was patient, relentless, guiding her through each loop and pull. I watched, unimpressed, as a lumpy, vaguely spherical form began to grow from the initial spiral. This was the vessel. It was pathetic. I took a brief, 45-minute nap, and upon waking, saw she had managed to create a second, smaller lump. Then came the truly ghoulish part. She took a cloud of soft, white fluff—the good stuff, the kind I like to pull out of pillows—and began forcing it into the hollow yarn vessel with a stick. She was giving the creature entrails. After it was grotesquely swollen, she used a needle to attach the smaller lump, creating a "head." The final act was sewing on the two black eyes. The creature, "Kiki," was born. It sat on the coffee table, a lopsided, vacant-eyed mockery of a living thing. My human, beaming with an unearned sense of accomplishment, picked up the yellow golem and dangled it before me. "What do you think, Pete? It's Kiki!" I leaned in for a professional assessment. It smelled of her, of yarn, and of mild failure. I extended a single, perfect claw and gently poked its bulbous stomach. It wobbled pathetically. This was no demon, no worthy foe. It was, however, the perfect density for a brisk pummelling. I gave it a solid right hook, sending it flying across the hardwood floor. It slid beautifully. Worthy? Not of my respect, no. But as a projectile for my private amusement? The ritual, against all odds, was a success.
