A pamphlet of feline opinion · est. mmxxv
Pete, the resident feline critic
The Pete Gazette
The Toy Story Desk Reviewed for kids & the grown-ups who shop for them Reviewed from the windowsill
Also Reviewed
Mattel
Neurotic Rex Demoted to Scratching-Post Furniture
★★★☆☆
Mattel
Woody Toppled, Hat Accepted as Tribute, Court Adjourned
★★☆☆☆
Mattel
Pete Rewrites the Story: Cowboy Down, Horse Free
★★★☆☆
From the wires — the critic descends upon the next desk shortly. The toys have been warned.
Lead Review · From: Disney Store
Sheriff Disarmed: Hat Claimed, Sent Under Armchair
Our critic strips the talking cowboy of authority with one paw-flick, pockets the hat as a trophy, and concedes the figure earns its keep as a smaller-prize dispenser.
By Pete · Resident Feline Critic

My human seems to have acquired a lanky, grinning automaton they call "Sheriff Woody." It's from the Disney Store, which usually implies a certain baseline quality, but this thing is clearly meant for the clumsy little humans. Its primary feature is a pull-string that makes it spout nonsense—a guaranteed interruption to any serious nap. I will concede two p…

Continued on the story page →
Image of Disney Store Official Sheriff Woody Talking Action Figure from Toy Story, Features Sounds and Phrases from The Movies, Interacts with Other Figures and Toys
Fig. 1 — the subject
Pete's Verdict
★★★☆☆
The hat was the only prize.
From The Desk
Image of Disney•Pixar's Toy Story Slinky Dog Pull Toy, Walking Spring Toy for Boys and Girls, Kids Toys for Ages 18 Month by Just Play
Just Play
Spring-Dog Promoted from Toy to Feline Instrument

My human has presented a new offering, an absurd-looking canine effigy named "Slinky Dog." Apparently, it's a pull-toy for their smaller, louder counterparts. From my superior van…

★★★★☆ — Not a toy. My instrument. Worthy.
More From The Desk
Image of Wonder Forge Toy Story 4 Matching Game | Build Focus and Memory with Woody, Buzz, and Beloved Pixar Characters | Fun and Engaging Activity for Kids Ages 3+
Wonder Forge
Omniscient Critic Solves Matching Game, Credits Luck

My human seems to believe my sophisticated brain requires "enrichment" in the form of children's games. From what I can gather, this "Wonder Forge To…

★★★★☆
Image of Jada Disney Pixar Toy Story 4 Turbo Buggy W/ Woody Radio Control Vehicle, 2.4 Ghz, 1: 24
Jada
One Paw Pins Turbo Buggy Mid-Chase, Chaos Subdued

My human, in their endless and often misguided quest to earn my approval, has presented me with this… thing. It appears to be a wheeled plastic contr…

★★★☆☆
Image of Toy Story Disney Advanced Talking Buzz Lightyear Action Figure 12''
Toy Story
Buzz Toppled; Surprise Wings Draw the Only Real Gasp

My human, in a fit of what I can only assume is nostalgia-driven foolishness, has procured a large, glossy bipedal effigy. It is apparently a "Buzz L…

★★★☆☆
Image of Disney Store Official Bath Set (Toy Story) - Kids Bath Accessories with Beloved Disney Characters - Colorful and Fun Bath Time Essentials for Kids - Suitable for All Ages
Disney Store
Rex Sentenced to Under-Vanity Exile After Tile Trial

My human has brought home what appears to be a bucket of brightly colored prisoners. The branding, "Disney Store," suggests a certain corporate-manda…

★★★☆☆
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