Pete's Expert Summary
My human seems to have acquired what can only be described as a quartet of oddly-shaped, brightly-colored fabric lumps from the human-kitten toy monolith, Mattel. They are apparently plush effigies of some kind of amphibious reptilian martial artists, a concept so absurd only a human could invent it. Their primary function, I deduce, is to be clutched by sticky-fingered toddlers. For a feline of my refined sensibilities, their appeal is limited. However, their advertised "easy-to-touch fabric" might offer a passable surface for an emergency nap, and their eight-inch stature presents a substantial target for a vigorous session of bunny-kicking, should the mood strike. Otherwise, they risk becoming yet another piece of decorative clutter, silently mocking me from a shelf.
Key Features
- Relive the adventure and fun of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem movie with this pack of 4 plush toys of key characters Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello and Raphael.
- These soft dolls are made of easy-to-touch fabric to be extra huggable. Designed with stylistic detail, these movie-themed plush toys are great for cuddling or playtime adventures and fun!
- Relive all their Turtle adventures as they set out to be accepted as normal teenagers while taking on a notorious crime syndicate and an army of mutants.
- This pack makes an instant collection of TMNT heroes, with Leo, Mikey, Donnie and Raph. Keep the team unified and you shall always succeed.
- Makes a great gift for TMNT fans ages 3 years old and up.
A Tale from Pete the Cat
The box arrived with the usual fanfare of tearing cardboard, a sound that promises either exquisite new napping surfaces or utter disappointment. My human, with a grin I’ve learned to distrust, pulled them out one by one and arranged them on the living room rug. Four of them, standing in a silent, unnerving line. A council of silent, goggle-eyed buffoons, each clad in a different colored scrap of fabric over their eyes. I watched from the arm of the sofa, tail twitching in critical assessment. They were an invading force, a soft-stuffed syndicate, and I, Pete, was the sole guardian of this territory. I descended from my perch with the deliberate grace of a predator and began my inspection. The one with the blue mask, clearly their stoic leader, was my first target. I circled him slowly, then leaned in for a deep, analytical sniff. He smelled of plastic packaging and a faint, soulless factory air. Unacceptable. I delivered a firm, testing head-bonk to his oversized green head. He simply flopped over, offering no resistance. Pathetic. I moved down the line, batting contemptuously at the orange one's face and giving the red one a quick, exploratory chew on his ear. They were all the same: pliant, silent, and utterly devoid of the will to fight back. My patrol complete, I stood in their midst, the victor of a battle they hadn't even known they were fighting. And then, a curious thought occurred to me. The human had not arranged them for battle, but for... something else. They formed a clumsy semi-circle. An ambush? No. An embrace. I lowered myself to the rug, testing the formation. The blue one, still prone from my assault, made an excellent headrest. The purple and red ones cushioned my flank, their squishy bodies conforming perfectly to my own elegant curves. The orange one provided a soft barrier for my paws to knead against. It was a revelation. These were not toys for play, a gross underestimation of their true purpose. They were a team of highly specialized comfort consultants. They were not warriors; they were courtiers, assembled for the sole purpose of providing me with a multi-angled, structurally-sound napping throne. Their passivity was not a weakness, but their greatest strength. I closed my eyes, a low, rumbling purr vibrating through my chest and into my new, plush subjects. They had been judged. And for now, they were worthy.
