A pamphlet of feline opinion · est. mmxxv
Pete, the resident feline critic
The Pete Gazette
The Pokemon Desk Reviewed for kids & the grown-ups who shop for them Reviewed from the windowsill
Also Reviewed
Pokemon
The Reject Pile as a Philosophical Statement
★☆☆☆☆
Pokemon
High HP Means High Horizontal Propulsion
★★★☆☆
Pokemon
The Shiny Idol Falls; the Congregation Remains Unenlightened
★★☆☆☆
From the wires — the critic descends upon the next desk shortly. The toys have been warned.
Lead Review · From: Pokemon
Fifty Cards Deployed as a Battle Schematic
Pete dismisses the cards as passive rectangles but conscripts them as tactical schematics for his campaign to claim the afternoon sunbeam by the window.
By Pete · Resident Feline Critic

My human has presented me with what appears to be a stack of thin, colorful rectangles of cardboard. They call them "Pokemon Cards," and seem oddly excited about the shiny ones, which they refer to as "foils" and "rares." From my vantage point on the plush rug, I see a collection of two-dimensional creatures, none of which have the decency to squeak, flutte…

Continued on the story page →
Image of 50+ Official Pokemon Cards Collection with 5 Foils in Any Combination and at Least 1 Rarity, GX, EX, FA, Tag Team, Or Secret Rare
Fig. 1 — the subject
Pete's Verdict
★★★☆☆
Not for play — for winning
From The Desk
Image of Pokemon TCG: Scarlet & Violet - Destined Rivals Booster Bundle - 6 Packs
Pokemon
A Royal Promenade Through the Destined Rivals Cult

So, my Human has presented me with a box full of smaller, crinkly packets. Inside these packets, I am told, are flat, glossy rectangles depicting various misshapen creatures. The …

★★☆☆☆ — Useful only to demonstrate my reign
More From The Desk
Image of Random Pokemon Japanese Booster Pack Lot of 4
Pokemon
The Snorlax Card Is Scripture; Pete Has Read It

My human, in their infinite and baffling wisdom, has acquired several small, crinkly pouches containing... flat paper squares. They call them "Pokémo…

★★★☆☆
Image of Pokemon TCG: Scarlet & Violet - Prismatic Evolutions Booster Bundle
Pokemon
Holographic Light Made Me a Celestial Hunter

My human has procured what appears to be a cardboard sarcophagus filled with smaller, crinkly packets. They call it a "Booster Bundle," which I can o…

★★★★☆
Image of Pokemon TCG: Scarlet & Violet - Surging Sparks Booster Bundle
Pokemon
One Leap Scattered the Destined Order; Box Claimed

So, the human has acquired another one of their curious little boxes. This one, a "Booster Bundle" from the Pokémon people, contains six smaller, cri…

★★★☆☆
Image of MEGA Pokémon Building Toys Set Squirtle & Cubone with 45 Pieces, 2 Poseable Characters and Poké Ball, 2 Inches Tall, for Kids
Mega Brands
The Golems Stand Guard; Pete Has the Leftover Piece

My Human has acquired another one of those "build-it-yourself" kits from a brand called "MEGA," a desperate attempt to occupy their clumsy, opposable…

★★☆☆☆
Image of MEGA Pokémon Building Toys Set Grass-Type Trainer Team with 118 Pieces, 4 Poseable Character, 2 Inches Tall, for Kids
Rowlet Rolled; Pete's Primordial Wiring Fired

So, the human has presented me with a box of what they call "building toys." It appears to be a collection of 118 tiny, brightly colored plastic rect…

★★★☆☆
Image of Pokémon TCG: Miraidon ex League Battle Deck
Dice Stolen, Box Claimed, Nap Achieved

So, my human has presented me with this… box. From what I can gather through my superior senses and a cursory glance at the packaging, it’s a collect…

★★★☆☆
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