A pamphlet of feline opinion · est. mmxxv
Pete, the resident feline critic
The Pete Gazette
The Beanie Baby Desk Reviewed for kids & the grown-ups who shop for them Reviewed from the windowsill
Also Reviewed
Ty
Storm-Born Deity Captured, Relocated to Pet's Sleeping Quarters
★★★★☆
Ty
Bunny Kick of Righteous Fury Greeted With Worthy Encore Plans
★★★★☆
Ty
Blue Alien Trophy Dragged to Nap Spot; Reign Confirmed
★★★★☆
From the wires — the critic descends upon the next desk shortly. The toys have been warned.
Lead Review · From: Ty
Pink Void-Eyed Imposter Assigned Chin-Rest Duties
Our critic gazes into the pink kitten's glitter-blue eyes, glimpses a cold cosmic abyss, bats it aside, and sentences the imposter to life as a closely monitored chin rest.
By Pete · Resident Feline Critic

My human, in another fit of misguided affection, has presented me with this... object. It is, I deduce, a plush effigy of one of my kind, produced by the notorious "Ty" corporation, purveyors of inert fluff with unsettlingly large eyes. This specimen, dubbed "Lillibelle," is an unnatural shade of pink, an affront to my sophisticated gray-and-white coat. Its…

Continued on the story page →
Image of Ty Beanie Bellies Lillibelle The Pink Kitten with Blue Glitter Eyes, Cuddly Plush Animals with Soft Belly Original 20 cm T41283
Fig. 1 — the subject
Pete's Verdict
★★★☆☆
Kept close. The void stays contained.
From The Desk
Image of Ty Beanie Bellies Alex The Pastel Axolotl - 6"
Ty
Pastel Axolotl Survives Full Interrogation, Earns Field Status

My human has presented me with this... object. It is a "Ty Beanie Belly," a small, plush effigy of some kind of garish water creature they call an "Axolotl." The branding is famil…

★★★☆☆ — Durable. It earned its field posting.
More From The Desk
Image of Ty Beanie Bellie Snapper The Frog - 6 inch
Ty
Green Frog Reclassified as Commando Landing Pad

My Human, in a fit of what I can only assume was profound boredom, has presented me with a "Ty Beanie Bellie." This particular specimen, an amphibian…

★★★☆☆
Image of Ty Beanie Boos Gilda - Pink Flamingo reg
Ty
Pink Flamingo Demoted From Friend to Luxury Nap Pillow

My human seems to have acquired a plush effigy of a long-legged water fowl from the brand "Ty," an entity known for producing dust-collecting shelf-s…

★★★☆☆
Image of Ty Beanie Bellies Small - Morgan The Cat, 6 inch
Ty
Colorful Pretender Scent-Marked, Sat Upon, Reassigned as Furniture

So, the Staff has presented me with this... object. It is, apparently, a miniature, grotesquely colorful effigy of a lesser cat, produced by a compan…

★★★☆☆
Image of Ty Beanie Boos T37322 Fisher The Bird with Glittery Blue Eyes, The Plush with Big Sparkly Eyes - 15 cm
Ty
Deep-Cover Bird Spy Fails Interrogation, Passes as Accomplice

My human has presented me with what appears to be a flightless, unnaturally soft avian specimen named "Fisher." It's from the "Ty" corporation, known…

★★★☆☆
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