Pete's Expert Summary
My human, in a moment of questionable judgment, has procured a device from the brand "Fotorama," which appears to be designed for the small, loud variety of human. It consists of a pair of absurdly large goggles and a plastic contraption that straps to the wrist. The objective, as far as my superior feline intellect can discern, is for the wearer to stumble around the house shooting at phantoms that only they can perceive through the eyewear. While the frantic, uncoordinated movements of a human chasing nothing might provide some fleeting slapstick amusement, the accompanying electronic "roaring" and the sheer amount of batteries required—six!—suggest this is a high-maintenance, low-reward endeavor that will primarily serve to disrupt my napping schedule. It is, in short, a glorified light-show tethered to a flailing human.
Key Features
- GRIPPING ACTION GAME – Save Earth from the Alien Invasion in this space shooter game. It's fun using your WRIST BLASTER to shoot the aliens targets as they appear through your SPACE GOGGLES. Three different colors of aliens pop up in the goggles and ROAR when they are eliminated!
- INTERACTIVE AND ENGAGING – Tag the red alien for double points! Home base announces your score at the end of each round. TEAM UP with your friends and catch aliens with this indoor and outdoor toy and join the neighborhood in this fight for humanity. A perfect Birthday Gift for Boys and Girls. Recommended for children ages 5 and up.
- 4 DIFFICULTY LEVELS, HAND-EYE COORDINATION, MOTOR SKILLS – With 4 levels of difficulty, your child will improve their hand-eye coordination and fine-tune their motor skills having fun being alien catchers.
- INCLUDES – 1 Wrist Blaster and 1 Pair of High-Tech Space Goggles, which allow you to see these invasive galactic creatures wherever you are. This is not a Virtual Reality game. (Batteries not included; this game requires 6 AAA batteries.)
- ABSOLUTELY SAFE AND FUN – Alien Vision passes testing by the US Consumer Products Safety Commission and is absolutely safe for children. Play inside, outside, or in the dark for even more fun! Great gift for your little defender.
A Tale from Pete the Cat
The case landed on my paws on a Tuesday. The evening air was thick with the scent of microwaved leftovers and impending foolishness. My human, The Dame, was fidgeting with a box. I watched from my observation post atop the bookcase, tail giving a slow, methodical sweep. She pulled out the hardware: a pair of goggles that looked like a fly's nightmare and a gray plastic blaster she strapped to her wrist. A dame in trouble? No. Just a dame with too much disposable income. She lowered the goggles over her eyes and the living room went dark for her, but I could still see everything. She stood there, a statue in a temple of bad taste, for a full ten seconds. Then, it began. A sudden lurch to the left. A frantic pointing of the wrist-thing at the empty air beside the ficus. A tinny, electronic *ZAP* echoed, followed by a synthetic "ROAR!" that sounded more like a dying battery than a creature of conquest. She was seeing things. Ghosts in the machine. I narrowed my eyes. This wasn't some spectral visitor; this was cheap electronics. The Dame was shadow-boxing with flickers of light. I padded silently across the floor, a gray ghost myself, to investigate the phenomenon up close. She whirled to face the wall, blasting away at an invisible foe, her reflection in the dark television screen a frantic pantomime. I saw the faint, colored lights from the goggles dance across her pupils—greens, blues, and a particularly aggressive red that made her yelp with a triumphant "Gotcha!" She was chasing points, not spirits. The whole charade was a self-contained loop of stimulus and response, a digital puppet show for an audience of one. The only alien in the room was this bizarre contraption itself, an invader of peace and quiet. The mystery wasn't who was haunting the house; it was why anyone would pay money to be haunted so poorly. Case closed. I stretched, a luxurious arch of my back, and gave a pointed yawn. The Dame could have her phantom menace. I had a more pressing engagement with a patch of moonlight on the Persian rug that was calling my name. Some battles, I concluded, are not worth fighting; they are worth sleeping through.
