A pamphlet of feline opinion · est. mmxxv
Pete, the resident feline critic
The Pete Gazette
The Nerf Desk Reviewed for kids & the grown-ups who shop for them Reviewed from the windowsill
Lead Review · From: Nerf
The Blaster Is Beneath Me, But the Darts Are Mine
Our critic dismisses the noisy launcher entirely but discovers the foam darts are superb prey-simulation objects worthy of his full predatory attention.

So, my human has acquired another piece of loud, brightly-colored plastic. This one, a "Nerf Elite 2.0 Commander RC-6 Blaster," appears to be a projectile-launching device. Its primary function is to disrupt the household's delicate tranquility by flinging small, foam cylinders up to 90 feet, a distance that encroaches upon several of my prime napping terri…

Continued on the story page →
Image of Nerf Elite 2.0 Commander RC-6 Blaster, 12 Elite Darts, 6-Dart Rotating Drum, Tactical Rails, Barrel and Stock Attachment Points
Fig. 1 — the subject
Pete's Verdict
★★★☆☆
Crude vessel, glorious ammunition.
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